Chicken Soup for the Titan Lover's Soul
by Princess Starfire of Tamaran
Summary: A collection of fluffy oneshots starring the rxs, bbxrae, cyxjinx, and cyxbee pairings. From laughs to tears, it's all romance and it's all good for the Titan enthusiast's soul. Rated for safety.
1. Part 1: Laughs: A Black Ego

**Part 1: Laughs A Black Ego**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

BBxRae. First instalment of Chicken Soup for the Titan Lover's Soul. Beast Boy is training with Raven and she's winning this round... but the Changeling has a few tricks up his sleeve.

* * *

"NO NO NO NO NO!"

WHACK!

"Ugh…"

"Good one," Cyborg commented. Robin winced and coughed.

"Er, yeah… good one, Raven." The Boy Wonder ground out. "But are you sure this is the best form of training for Beast Boy?" he asked carefully. Even as the great leader of the titans… he was not one to arguer with the petite empath standing before him, one pale hand propped on a shapely hip. The Changeling sat up upon hearing his name and lethargically blinked one eye at a time.

"Damn, Rae. I'm praying I never actually have to fight you," he chortled. Raven smirked.

"Mhm. Well, you still need to learn to stop running. Jeez, you act like you've never fought a battle before," she mused airily. Beast Boy scowled.

"Dude, I usually _don't_ fight short chicks that blow things up when they've got PMS," he retorted. Raven sneered.

"Who are you calling short?" she spat irritably. Beast Boy chuckled at that and pulled to his feet, rubbing his head again. That last wall of telekinetic power had been rather strong. He walked to her so he posed his lanky frame a mere three inches from her. Raven's stoic eyes widened ever so slightly. He was a good inch taller than her. And they were nearly nose to nose.

WHACK!

"Akk!" Beast Boy hissed as he was uppercut by a blade of black energy. He stumbled backwards. "Gawd! Touchy, touchy!" he whined. "I can't help it if I'm tall, dark, and handsome," he winked then. Raven stared at him with nothing less than a completely irritated death glare.

"You're not tall. Perhaps taller than me, but you're not tall. Hell, you're shorter than _Robin_," she quipped. Robin sputtered.

"Hey! You say that like it's surprising!" he protested. Raven blinked in his direction.

"It is."

"… Dawgs, I got all of y'all beat," Cyborg grinned. Robin rolled his eyes behind his mask. The others didn't see it, but Raven provided the visual aid necessary with her own roll of indigo optics. Cyborg grinned and then laughed, clapping both Beast Boy and Robin on the shoulders. Beast Boy cringed.

"Dude, gentle." He reminded. Cyborg simpered. Robin looked in the direction of the fifth occupant of the hallway, who was the epitome of a floating bundle of violet joy. The Tamaranian had been silently observing the happenings with curious emerald eyes.

"Hey, is Star taller than you?" he asked, tilting his head to the side and sizing up both the alien girl and her cybernetic teammate. Cyborg shook his head.

"Naw, she's just got the whole platform shoe thing going on. Besides, she's always floating and what not. So it doesn't really count," Cyborg said nonchalantly. Robin lifted a brow behind his eye-mask.

"Truly, I do believe friend Cyborg to be correct. My height may be of closer comparison but I am quite sure that he has the… what is it that you terrans say? The higher limb?"

"Upper hand, Star," Robin corrected patiently. The red-head blushed.

"Yes. That." She giggled. Meanwhile, tension was building. Green into violet, laughing into smoldering irritation. The three titans stopped their conversing and allowed their eyes to drift to empath and changeling, both competing in a test of will. Neither moved, they simply stared into one another's eyes. Beast Boy had a smug grin plastered across his childish face, while Raven combated him with her patented glare.

"What's wrong, Rae? Got your ego bruised?" Beast Boy chortled, his smirk growing wider and even more impish with every word. Raven narrowed her eyes until they were nothing more than slender winks of amethyst.

"No. I'm just wondering why you're so proud of yourself," she snapped. Beast Boy was undeterred, in fact he seemed thoroughly entertained with the prospect of further flustering the dark girl.

"Hehe, Shorty!" BB crowed gleefully.

"Azerath…"

"Sh-sh-sh-shorty!" he began to wriggle about in some odd form of dance, mocking her the best he could.

"Metrion…"

"Gimme' an S! Gimme' an H! Gimme' an O! Gimme' an R! Gimme' a T…?"

"Zinthos."

"Wha--- AHHH!" Beast Boy was sent hurtling down the length of the hall, propelled by a comet of obsidian energy, and was plowed soundly into the door to the Gym. Beast Boy slumped to the ground and moaned, looking up dizzily.

"Don't mock me when we're training. Actually… just. Don't. Mock. Me." Raven growled. And with that final statement she turned on dainty heel and stalked gracefully off to her room, cloak tails fluttering with her firm gait. "Robin, I'll finish training tonight. With a different partner." Raven called over her shoulder. Robin lifted a finger to reply, but let it drop with a wince as her door banged shut.

Beast Boy slithered to his feet. "Ho ho! Little thang packs a punch!" he declared with a wiggle of his eyebrows. Cyborg rolled his one human eye with a heavy sigh.

"Dawg, you swim in dangerous waters…"

"Hey, danger's my middle name! No, wait… it's my _first_ name!" the little changeling pumped his fists in a manner that somehow supplied greatly to his image of an awkwardly stringy adolescent.

"But I had conceived the notion that the first name originally bestowed upon you by your ancestors was that of Garfield… is this not also a similar dubbence to the obese feline in the paper of news?" Starfire trilled. Beast Boy's rapturous expression faltered and then failed. Robin coughed, holding back a snicker.

"Er, yeah… um… I'll, I dunno, go apologize to Rae or something?" he offered. Cyborg let loose with a bellow of loud guffaws and Beast Boy cringed. At least Robin was politely attempting to maintain his composure…

"Is this… entertaining? I had considered Garfield to be a delightful name!" Starfire protested earnestly. Whatever composure the Boy Wonder had been attempting to maintain, he lost then and there. Between gasps of breath he replied.

"N-no, Star… it's a _delightful_ name… you're right… it's just….HAHAHA!" Robin's laughter chased the disillusioned changeling down the hall as he slunk off towards Raven's room. Though it had been something of a bluff, he really did intend on apologizing to Raven. He'd been particularly irritating this morning and he understood fully that the dark girl could not afford to have any form of aggravation elicited from her without the threat of melting the tower down to a wasted heap of twisted steel.

His fist hesitated a few inches from her door, wary to knock but reluctant to leave without some form of repentance. With a rueful sigh he let his fist connect with her door. A hollow, ringing, tap responded. He knocked three times and then waited, elf ears drooping. Oh, if only Raven could be swayed by the kitty face…

A moment or two later, the door slid a few miniscule inches open and an indigo eyes peered out at him. "What do you want now…? I'm trying to meditate." Raven ground out. Beast Boy simpered.

"Er, well… I… came to apologize…?" he offered. Raven blinked. She slid the door open the rest of the way.

"Apologize for what?" Raven asked blankly, her voice flat and uninterested. Beast Boy stared at her, moving his jaw sluggishly in an attempt to say something.

"For… for… mocking you earlier!" he practically gasped. Raven rolled her eyes.

"Beast Boy, that's really nothing new. You've constantly made it your highest occupation to find every way possible to irritate me. On that same note, you should understand quite well that on those rare occasions that you do succeed in agitating me I am forced to meditate for quite some time before I can leave my room knowing I will not cause you to spontaneously combust due to my slightly… dangerous emotions," she breathed the speech as if it had been said many times before, and perhaps it had been. Beast Boy figured at some point or another most of the other Titans had found themselves in this predicament.

"Um… right…" he grinned sheepishly, shoulders slouching slightly. "But I still wanted to say sorry. Ya know… just to… say it…" he shrugged. Raven regarded him for a few moments.

"Then… thank you for being considerate for once," Raven replied. Beast Boy beamed, having one the favor of the dark maiden… at least for the moment. "Maybe you _did_ learn _something_ in training today," she smirked a very tiny, unusually friendly smirk. Beast Boy started to protest but then stopped himself, realizing that Raven was actually standing there, acting cordially towards him. It made him happy.

"Hehe, so it's the gentlemanly type that impresses you?" he winked. Raven sighed.

"Beast Boy, for once be a little mature. But if you must know, yes. I do hold more respect for gentlemen." Raven droned. Beast Boy tilted his head to the side.

"I guess I should try to be more of gentleman then?"

"Beast Boy, don't even _try_ to win my respect. Between chugging soy milk and spewing it out of your nose and performing armpit-fart serenades on movie night… the task of earning my respect is most impossible for you," she blinked. Beast Boy flushed.

"W-well… at least I've been doing my best!" he retorted. It was Raven's turn to offer a tilt of the head.

"Best to do what?" she asked. Beast Boy dropped his gaze to the floor.

"To impress you, Rae," he mumbled. "That's all it's ever been," Raven stared at him. A minute ticked by and then another.

"Why on earth would you ever want to impress me?" Raven asked, and Beast Boy was surprised to detect the slightest bit of awe at this confession. It was as if Raven had never considered herself worthy of receiving another's affections.

"Because… you may not respect me, but I respect you." He looked up, laughing eyes suddenly very, very serious. "I really do mean that." Beast Boy said earnestly. Raven hugged herself, sinking into her cloak a little, thanking her hood for hiding the impending blush that was pressing against her cheeks.

"Um, thanks…" Raven mumbled. Beast Boy lost his solemn disposition and a goofy grin slapped onto his features.

"Hey, I'm getting pretty good at this!" he exclaimed, puffing out his chest. Raven scowled.

"Good at what?"

"Flirting. I mean, really, when you think about it… if I'd tried to talk to you last year you would've lobbed my head off by now," he stated with a wave of his hand. Raven glowered.

"You can never be mature, can you! My God, Beast Boy…" she growled, preparing to retreat back into her room.

"Akk! Rae! Hang on!" Beast Boy grabbed onto her shoulder. Raven grimaced and glanced back at him.

"What?" she muttered. Beast Boy sighed, rolling his eyes.

"Alright, so I ruined a moment. Whatever. At least let me finish the good part," he whined. Raven lifted a single brow.

"Good part….? Mf!" Raven was cut short as Beast Boy pressed a devilish kiss to her lips. "Beast Boy!" Raven hissed as she threw him off of her a few seconds later. Beast Boy toppled to the ground. Raven's hair was fluttering with black energy. "What the hell?" she growled, scurrying into her room and whirling to face him, fuming. "Don't you _ever_ do that again," she snapped. Beast Boy glared up at her.

"Hey, you _know_ you liked it." He retorted. Raven opened and closed her mouth a few times and then finally heaved a deep breath, closing her eyes and calming herself before locking her gaze with the green teen once more.

"Beast Boy, if there was ever the _slightest_ chance of me respecting you, you have TOTALLY obliterated it,"

"Raven, what the heck is your problem? It was just a kiss… jeez!" Beast Boy protested, suddenly regretting his moment of blind courageousness.

"It was n-not just a kiss… it was… a very, very _bad_ kiss. N-next time, you have to g-give me some warning!" Raven chastised, her voice faltering as a very humiliating scarlet stained her cheeks. She brought her pale hands to her cheeks and winced, shuffling the rest of the way into her room. She faced him one last time. "You're… such an idiot," Raven grumbled, attempting to revive her cold demeanor and failing miserably. The usually graceful and unfazed Raven moved somewhat jerkily to the panel on her inner wall and let the door slam shut.

Beast Boy remained plopped on the floor, both eyebrows lifted and eyes wide. Slowly, an immensely pleased grin slithered across his face. "Next time, eh? … Beast Boy, you're good man… you're reeeaaal good," he nodded to himself and then dragged back to his feet for what felt like the umpteenth time that day. He paused and then chuckled, gleeful. Training with Raven… was not so bad after all.

* * *

Author's Note: Hi, this is my newest piece. Chicken Soup will basically be something akin to the books in that it will be a collection of short stories, in this case one-shots. They will focus on the various pairings, of course I will not be writing ANY rae/rob or bb/star or cy/star or anything wierd like that. By now my readers should know who I support and who I do not ;). Due to the rumors going about that review responses are not allowed to be posted within the story content I will not be able to reply to any of you who are kind enough to review for me. I sincerely appologize, but know now that every one of your comments are highly appreciated and valued. This is my first BBxRae one-shot and due to the fact there wasn't as much time alotted to plot-developement and the such I suppose it might appear a bit OOC. For that, I also appologize. I will be posting a RxS piece for the next chapter... probably. After that I will try my hand at both a CyxBee and a CyxJinx. I like both couples... oh well. Since I did not want to make a whole chapter dedicated to contents, I will list for you the basic parts to this coming "collection."

Part 1: Laughs

Part 2: Tears

Part 3: Bittersweet

Part4: Starfire (2 one-shots from Star's POV)

Part 5: Raven (2 one-shots from Rae's POV)

Part 6: Cyborg (2 one-shots from Cy's POV)

Part 7: Robin (you see where this is going, right!)

Part 8: Beast Boy (look above...)

That's just the tentative sort of catagory thing I hope to accomplish. I'm sorry to say this project may take a while because my writing is limited to weekends. Even now, I am subject to my parent's ruling and am thusly unable to bring you fluffiness during the week. They want me to stay focused. Heh, I guess it makes sense. Whatever. Sorry for the insanely long A/N. As stated earlier, reviews are priceless!

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran


	2. Part 1: Laughs: Pixie Stix

**Part 1: Laughs Pixie Stix**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans or Pixie Stix or Hershey

Robin comes home from a really long day, wanting nothing more than some peace and quiet. What he gets is a sugar high alien princess who decides it's her job to lift his spirits.

* * *

Robin was tired. Everything about him was just… tired. Even the usually robust growl of the R-cycle sounded more like a sedated purr. He was truly a weary person as he drove back towards Titans Tower. He supposed spending a day at the Mayor's office could do that to you. The mayor was, to say the least, a little dull. Though extremely photogenic and wonderful at seducing a crowd, when it came to the actual affairs of the office… the mayor of Jump City was utterly useless. The Boy Wonder highly suspected that the person that was really running the city was Margie.

Margie, the mayor's secretary, was about as tiring as the mayor himself. Robin had come early that morning and sat outside of the mayor's office waiting for two hours with nothing to do but warily watch Margie flit about from the phone to her computer to the file cabinet and back again. It had nearly made him dizzy.

He had finally been ushered into the mayor's office by the busy-body secretary. Once within, he faced a task that was almost as trying as a fight with the most notorious villains. Conversing with the mayor. Robin had honestly prayed to be struck down dead once or twice throughout the meeting. Whatever it was about the mayor that charmed cameras did nothing of the sort to Robin and the young hero was almost disgusted by the suave hair-do and award winning smile.

It may have been the fact that Robin's view of fame was totally disillusioned after suffering through countless aristocratic parties with Bruce Wayne or it may have been his detective's instinct that made him dislike the mayor so much. Either way, he perceived the man to be totally plastic and it vexed him to no end. Or it could have been something else entirely… like that the man had an IQ rivaling that of a peanut.

But that didn't really matter. All Robin knew at this point was that he was exhausted and prayed he would _never_ have to review the Titans' budget with the mayor again. As he pulled up the long drive cutting across the Titans' island, he silently hoped that Starfire had made him something to eat again. She was usually considerate about such things and prepared food and drink for him whenever he returned from an outing.

It had taken some time before the things Star had made for him were edible, but it had been a flattering gesture all the same. He sighed and turned off the r-cycle as he rumbled into the garage. Robin wanted nothing more than a quiet evening lacking all mention of those who were of less-than-stellar cerebral power. Perhaps he would receive his wish of a mayor-less evening, but a quiet one? No, that was not about to be granted to the lethargic Boy Wonder.

"HEEEEEEEE!" Starfire's shrill laughter bubbled out to him as he opened the door into the tower. He blinked, immediately wary. "Oh, Beast Boy, vocalize to me the dubbence of this fine, sugary convection once more, please! I must not forget the name of such a wondrous item," Starfire giggled. Robin lifted an eyebrow and slowly ventured down the hall towards the main room. He distinctly detected a pitiful whimper come in response to the girl's request.

As he came closer, he heard the rustling of paper. "Is there more? Oh goodness! No, this is most terrible! This is an absolute atrocity! Unacceptable! Beast Boy, there _must_ be more of this miraculous substance," Starfire's voice was almost pleading, and yet she was plagued with a fit of giggles soon after. As Robin stepped into the main room, he found his eyes assaulted with color. Everywhere.

The scene before him was… disturbing. Starfire was giggling madly and hovering mid-room clutching her stomach. Her brilliant eyes sparkled with undeniable euphoria and her exotically tanned cheeks were flushed. About her were thin tubes of colored paper. In fact, the small tubes were very close to overtaking the room.

Beast Boy was huddled with his back against the wall, pressed as tightly as he could to it and his knees tucked up to his chest. The green teen winced as Starfire ballerina-twirled about the room. His forest green eyes landed on Robin's form in the doorway. "Eh, hey Rob…" Beast Boy choked out. Robin stared at Beast Boy and then looked at Starfire. And then back at Beast Boy. A crease formed on his brow and he narrowed his eyes.

"Hello, Beast Boy… would you mind telling me what's going on?" he asked, deciding to abandon the hope of Starfire having prepared him dinner. Beast Boy simpered and then ducked his head down and shifted into a turtle as Starfire swooped down to him. The changeling remained stopped up in his shell.

"Beast Boy? Beast Boy! BEAST BOY!" Starfire trilled, knocking on his shell. "Beast Boy, I do implore you to inform me… is there more?" she pestered.

"N-n-no… you ate the whole s-stash!" Beast Boy wailed from within his shell. Starfire pouted then, her lip quivering.

"Oh… how incredibly horrible! I cannot believe such a thing!" Starfire protested. She suddenly whipped away from him and locked her gaze on Robin, as if having noticed him for the first time. "Friend Robin! Many greetings!" Starfire smiled widely and zipped over to him, laughing rapturously. "I am elated to see that you have returned!" she cried as she threw herself on to him, consuming him in a massive hug.

Robin gasped for breath as she removed every breath of air in his lungs from him and lifted him off of the ground. "S-Star…" he wheezed. Starfire abruptly stopped her laughter and blinked.

"OH! My sincerest appologieeeeees!" Starfire sang, bursting out into more giggles. She released him.

"WHA!" Robin dropped hard onto the ground. "Ow… Beast Boy, what's going on?" Robin asked again. Beast Boy poked his turtle head out from his shell and blinked, shifting back to human form.

"Well, you see…" Beast Boy trailed off and watched in perplexity as Starfire scooped up a handful of the colorful paper tubes and threw them into the air. The fluttered to the ground, a few of them landing in Robin's unruly mop of ebony hair. Robin let his gaze travel upwards and then reached to his hair and grabbed out the tube. He read the tiny white wording printed across it.

"Beast Boy, Pixie Stix?" Robin asked, his gaze accusing.

"W-well… ya see, I was having one and Star came out and then… she asked what one was and…"

"You let her eat your entire stash of colored _sugar_!" Robin groaned. Beast Boy nodded sheepishly. Starfire snickered and hopped from one foot to the other.

"Oh, and the sticks of pixie are _most_ enjoyable!" She bubbled, shaking Robin's shoulders for emphasis. Robin nodded.

"Er, yeah… but maybe you ate a little too much?" he offered, sending a glare in Beast Boy's direction. BB simply shrugged and remained pressed into the corner. Starfire shook her head furiously and then brought her face up to his so their noses were pressed together. Robin went cross-eyed and he attempted to back up, but Star still had her hands firmly clamped onto his shoulders.

"No! I do not believe it to be possible to consume too many of the delightful treats… Friend Robin, do _you _have any more sticks of the pixie?" Starfire asked hopefully, jade eyes growing very wide. Robin would have declared the pleading expression endearing had he been able to think outside of the fact that Starfire practically had her face smashed to his.

"Sorry…Star… I don't have any… Pixie Stix… right now…" he ground out. Starfire's face fell and she released him. He tumbled backwards a few steps, his balance off with the abrupt release. She regarded him carefully, floating a few feet off of the ground and pouting cutely.

"Oh, that is a most incredible shame…" she sighed, sinking to the ground. Robin almost felt guilty. "Welllllll… how was _your_ day?" Starfire peeped, her expression brightening suddenly and her smile returning.

"Not the best. Beast Boy, I thought we discussed the consequences of aiding one of your teammates in becoming obnoxiously sugar high," he said, eyeing Beast Boy irritably. Starfire didn't really bother him in her elated state, in fact he would have found her to be absolutely adorable as she beamed at him, innocently blissful. However, Beast Boy's stash of candy had caused… disturbances before. When Cyborg had gotten sugar high on Hershey Bars… either way, Robin had made Beast Boy promise to be more considerate when letting the others have some of the candy…or having it himself for that matter.

"Y-yeah, I know… but Star's got one hell of a puppy face and… I mean, _you_ can't say no to her either!" Beast Boy retorted. Robin huffed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Just… that was stupid… I mean… she's an _alien_. How do you know that… alien sugar highs aren't… I don't know… bad…?" he sighed. Robin rolled his eyes and looked back, only to jump in surprise. Starfire was peering at him with bright, concerned eyes.

"Aww… Robin, are you unhappy?" Starfire purred. He swallowed, suddenly uncomfortable with her close proximity.

"No, I'm perfectly fine…" he coughed.

"I do not wish for you to be unhappy!" Starfire scolded, her sympathetic mood turning grumpy instantly.

"Really, Star, I'm fine," he assured her, taking a step back. Starfire floated forward.

"I shall not have the unhappiness in this room!" Starfire declared. "I will have to remedy this," she hummed, tapping her chin and pondering a way to fix the situation. "Ah! I know! Perhaps… the 'kiss to make it better'? Is this appropriate?" Starfire inquired.

"Seriously, I'm fine! You don't have to…!" Starfire stopped his protests as her lips were pressed soundly over his. Beast Boy's eyes grew wide as he remained huddled in the corner. Robin's mind went blank for a total of three seconds before he registered what was happening. Once it clicked, he had no problem returning the favor Starfire was bestowing on him. He heard her give a very tine peep of surprise as he moved his lips against hers.

Robin's arm wound around her waist and he pulled her close to him. She remained in his embrace as the kiss ended, at which point both simply stared at each other for a few moments, both quite surprised with their own actions.

"Beast Boy?" Robin said carefully. Beast Boy swallowed. Was Robin going to massacre him now or later…?

"Y-yes?" BB whimpered. A very slow smirk worked its way onto his features.

"Go buy some more Pixie Stix,"

* * *

Author's Note: Here's the next piece! I hope you liked it. I'm glad to see people are interested in the idea. Let us all hope the petition works because I would very much like to be able to give some more direct review responses. Oh well. Not much can be done about it. I'll try to post more next weekend. Until then, I hope this piece is satisfactory. Comments and criticism are welcome.

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran


	3. Part 1: Laughs: The Mechanics of Love

**Part 1: Laughs The Mechanics of Love**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

Cyborg and Bumblebee have teamed up for some titan matchmaking magic... unfortunately, neither is very talented in that area. But none the less, matches will be made...

* * *

Cyborg yawned and unplugged himself for the day, sliding off of his metal platform of a bed and stretching his titanium limbs. A grin spread across his face. Today was the day. It had been planned weeks in advance, and Cyborg was eager to go. It had all started last month, when Cyborg had been making his weekly correspondence with Titans East.

As was the case at the time, it was Bumblebee who picked up the television link and appeared on screen. After a brief exchange of "Hey, Bee!" and "'Sup, Sparky?" the two had conversed for quite some time, exchanging stories from each of the towers and updating one another on the newest villains to keep an eye out for. It was around the time that they had begun to speak about their teammates that the topic of romances came up.

It seemed that both towers had their loners, in this case a certain Aqualad and Raven. So thus the plans were formulated to bring love into the lives of these isolated teens. Bee had been initially surprised by Cyborg's eagerness to unite Raven with Aqualad, but soon came to understanding when Cyborg shared his brotherly feelings for the young empath.

Cyborg was, on the other hand, completely unsurprised to find that Bumblebee was equally eager to find love for Aqualad. Upon her questioning why he thought her willingness so normal, he declared romanticism to be an unavoidable side-effect of estrogen. So, the two matchmakers arranged a communal picnic. The Titans East would take a day trip out to Jump City and feast with Cyborg, Raven, Beast Boy, Robin, and Starfire. And during this inhalation of food, Cyborg and Bee would work their "magic" in an attempt to bring Aqualad and Raven together. Had they looked at the situation reasonably, they would have realized this task was a most daunting one.

None the less, Cyborg was the most chipper of the team as they readied themselves to go picnicking. "Ready, y'all?" Cyborg asked, grinning widely and sending a furtive glance in Raven's direction. The dark girl did not notice, much to absorbed in staring glumly at her feet.

"Is this totally necessary? I really have no desire to sit outside and watch you boys act as if you were emaciated swine," she droned. Starfire gave a distressed squeak.

"Oh, but friend Raven it is most glorious outside! The sun is shining and the sky is clear and the birds are performing sweet vocalizations…"

"That's exactly why I don't want to go," Raven replied blankly.

"What of the butterflies? Do you dislike them as well?" Starfire's emerald eyes were wide.

"Yeah. I tend to _dislike_ worms with wings," Raven muttered. Cyborg shifted his weight. Perhaps this would be harder than he anticipated. He hadn't even got Raven out of the tower yet…

"Raven, such a view of things is most horrid!" Starfire shook her head in dismay. Who in their right mind could dislike butterflies? Luckily, Robin distracted her. Unluckily (for Robin, that is) distracting Starfire from dwelling on the morbid idea of a being who might be capable of hating butterflies included the promise that he would help her catch one of the bright-winged insects. Somehow, the simple idea of the Boy Wonder prancing across a field with a butterfly net was enough to cut down his ego a good deal.

After a few more minutes of coaxing on Cyborg's part and a final word from Beast Boy, they finally succeeded in getting a deflated Raven out the door and into the T-car. Cyborg gave a sigh of relief.

The titans reached the Jump City Park to find that Bumblebee and her gang had already set up the picnic blanket. Within moments of the team stepping out of the car they were hurtled into the activities that would end up consuming most of their day. Beast Boy took up Speedy's challenge of acting as a moving target and was soon sprinting madly across the park in deer form, evading the agile archer's blazing arrows.

Starfire was fairly attacked by Mas and Menos. Robin quickly followed the red-head and her two new appendages, doing his best to discreetly pry off the twins. He was somewhat opposed to the idea of the two short boys clinging to the hem of her skirt.

Cyborg quickly grabbed Raven by the wrist and ushered her over to the blanket where Bumblebee was engaged in conversation with Aqualad. Bee looked up and discreetly winked in Cyborg's direction. "Hey, Sparky, nice to see ya again!" she grinned, standing to her feet and propping a bronze-toned hand on her hip.

"Hi Bee, Aqualad," Cyborg greeted. Raven gave both Aqualad and Bumblebee and equally neutral glare.

"Hi, Cyborg. Hello Raven," Aqualad said politely, still seated Indian-style on the picnic blanket. In his hand was a gallon jug of water which was already half empty.

"Hey, Rae, why don't you hang with Aqualad for a couple minutes? I need get a word with Bee alone, if you don't mind," he said. Bumblebee lifted an eyebrow. Raven stared up at Cyborg with stoic eyes.

"Sure." She said, utterly emotionless. She sat down next to Aqualad on the blanket. He looked over. She returned the glance. "Hi." She said. And then she proceeded to take up lotus position and meditate, completely ignoring the Atlantian beside her. Aqualad didn't seem bothered, being the friendly but quiet type himself. He contentedly settled back on his elbow and looked up at the cloudless azure sky.

Cyborg shook his head. Bee rolled her chocolate colored eyes. The two strolled off a few feet away, just out of ear-shot but still in range of sight. "Something tells me this might be difficult," Cyborg said.

"Something makes me agree," Bee concurred. Then she blinked. "Are you any good at this anyways?" She inquired.

"What, matchmaking?" Cyborg responded. Bumblebee nodded. "Er, never tried. But I'm good at everything so I guess I could say yes," he chuckled and winked. Bumblebee snorted. Cy frowned.

"What's that for?" he asked, scowling. Bee laughed.

"Good at everything? If I remember right, I totally kicked your butt back at the HIVE academy…" she reminded him. Cyborg rolled his human eye.

"Whatever. I was going easy on you. Besides, I'm better at this than you," he said, motioning a titanium hand back at the two seated on the blanket. Neither had moved. Raven still meditated and Aqualad still stared at the sky. He sweat-dropped. Bumblebee clucked.

"Mhm, you're reeeaaal good at this," she hummed. "All you've done is leave them alone together."

"That's what they do in movies," Cyborg retorted. Bumblebee chuckled.

"You sure are something, Sparky." She drawled. Cyborg frowned.

"Well, I do well enough for myself," he muttered. Bumblebee lifted an eyebrow.

"Say what? I don't believe that one," she shook her head skeptically. Cyborg lifted a finger to speak but was cut off by the ethnic wail of Mas… or maybe Menos… as he was hurled off of Starfire by a hard whack from the flat of a bo-staff. Robin was vehemently hissing something about keeping their toddler-sized hands to themselves. Bumblebee was still staring at Cyborg with rueful eyes. That tin-man could _not_ honestly be good with the ladies.

"Anyways, I'll have you know I'm a true, blue, love machine. I mean, you won't find a guy who can pucker up better than me," he chuckled arrogantly. Bee blinked.

"Sure. No offense, but I'll have to see it to believe it," she rolled her almond eyes and let a chuckle of her own escape. He sure was cute, thinking he was so smooth and whatnot… she almost snorted.

"Alright," Cyborg replied.

"What?"

"I said, alright," he repeated.

"Alright to what?" she asked, confused.

"You said you had to see it to believe it so I'm 'gonna show you right now," he slurred. Bumblebee was about say something sarcastic in reply, but was caught off guard when a strong arm looped around her slender waist and she was dipped back, supported by a titanium hand. Her features were riddled with surprise, shock, and even a little embarrassment when Cyborg did indeed pucker up and plant a firm kiss right on her full lips.

Her first thought was something on the lines of "kick 'em in the balls!" but it was soon replaced with the realization that Cyborg was indeed able to prove what he had claimed. And she liked it. A lot. Cyborg himself had intended on making it a quick kiss to prove a point, but found that now that he actually had the spunky little lady in his arms… he didn't really want to let go…

Of course, oxygen was a necessity and despite the enjoyment both took in the spontaneous kiss, they parted staring at one another with equal amounts of surprise. Bumblebee took a deep breath… and then another… and then she grinned, eyes sparkling mischievously. "Well I'll be… C'mere Sparky!" she chuckled and reached a slender hand to the back of his head and pulled him back into a kiss. She could feel the line where his warm flesh met frigid metal, but she didn't care. He was human enough right now…

"_Beast Boy!"_ the loudly exclaimed words sent the two lip-locked heroes tumbling away from one another and their attentions were slammed back onto the two whom had been the original focus of all the matchmaking. Aqualad was staring bug-eyed at Raven who was looked thoroughly vexed. Her eyes glowed an angry white, but betraying crimson died her alabaster cheeks.

"Shut up," Raven ground out. "He'll hear you… and just… shut up," she jerked her hood up over her indigo hair and simmered as Aqualad waved his arms in an uncharacteristic manner that gave him the appearance of a blue, spandex-clad fowl.

"But Beast Boy? Seriously!" Aqualad jittered. Raven nodded stiffly.

"Now leave me alone. Do you want me tell Robin that the twins aren't the only Titans East members of Starfire's fan club?" Raven hissed. Aqualad sobered.

"Ok. My lips are sealed… it's not like the fish would want to know anyhow and I don't talk much outside of that so… secret's safe, swear it!" Aqualad dropped back down onto the picnic blanket. Raven nodded slowly.

"Wouldn't have guessed…" she droned. Bumblebee and Cyborg were staring at the two slack-jawed. The pinging of arrows and Beast Boy's energetic yelps ceased and Robin even paused in his rant at Mas and Menos. All eyes had fallen on Raven and Aqualad. The content of their conversation was… fairly easy to guess despite Raven's desire to keep it quiet. Beast Boy had shifted back to elf form and had his eye-brows raised, a smug smirk beginning to form on his face.

"I guess… Raven and Aqualad aren't going to… get together…" Bumblebee coughed. Cyborg nodded slowly. "So… we just wasted the afternoon…" she finished. She drew her gaze over to Cyborg. The android blinked, and then a coy grin slid onto his features.

"Maybe it wasn't a total waste… I mean, so maybe matchmaking isn't my specialty but… I think I did pretty well for myself today, eh?" he chuckled. The smooth-talking leader of Titans East felt a little stain of pink rising to her chocolate-skinned cheeks.

"Yeah. I guess you did," and then she smiled.

* * *

Author's Note: I'm sorry I didn't post last weekend, I was at a wedding... which was incredibly fun. You gotta love family :):) Either way, this is the last fic of the "Laughs" section. Up next is Tears... of which I already have the first ready. Thank you so much for all of your reviews... they're very kind. This is my first Cyborg centered fic and I actually had some fun writing it. I hope you didn't find it boring. Your comments and suggestions are appreciated. I think I'm going to go through and do everything I planned and then I may add to certain sections later if I feel like it or have a second edition or something. We'll see. I'm contemplating a new chapter story... I really need to stay away from doing one right now because I doubt I have enough time to dedicate to one and you all know how much of a posting fanatic I am... so, yeah. None the less, I truly hoped you enjoyed it!

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran

P.S.- Everyone give a round of applause to Alas De Un Cuervo who was so kind as to edit this for me and remove all the evil grammar/spelling errors that overrun my work... she aslo edited the chapter that I will be posting next. So... like I said, give her a hug or something...


	4. Part 2: Tears: Words of a Final Whisper

**Part 2: Tears The Words of a Final Whisper**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

A word's aim is often more true than a gun's. A whisper is often more painful than any mortal wound. And missing your last chance to speak... is often more deadly than fatal blow.

* * *

Her chest heaved in shallow gasps, eyes blinking with numb surprise. Crimson hair fell forward over her face and hid her shocked expression. Everything in the room was utterly silent. She didn't scream. She didn't move. She simply clutched her stomach in disbelief. Her emerald eyes were locked on the shadowed form across the room from her. She still hovered in the air, but was slowly sinking towards the ground. A graceful fall in slow motion. 

"…no…" a voice uttered behind her. On the ground. Helpless. Unable to do anything but watch. And then the pain swelled and slapped her. Her fingers became feeling again and she was overwhelmed with the sensation of thick, wet life slithering over her skin. It was at that moment that a barely audible whimper broke her pale lips. She fell. The slow decent ceased and she tumbled from the air. She didn't even brace for the impending impact. Her body dropped swiftly down to earth like something completely lifeless and limp.

Her eyes slipped shut and she waited for the hard slamming of her body into the warehouse floor. She never hit the ground, but was caught up in two strong and defiant arms. She was brought to rest cradled against Robin's chest. Starfire knew she must be staining him with her blood. Her fingers curled in the metallic, sticky liquid that flowed from her wound. "Slade, you bastard!" Robin's snarl jerked out, the sound chasing after receding footsteps. Had she not been such a delicate cargo, Robin would have been running after the madman. However, he had no such chance. Nor did he want it right now. He had something much more desperate at hand.

And Slade's calmly dimming steps stated clearly that he knew. Starfire was wilting swiftly in his arms. His heart pounded. That damned bastard had sunk lower than low. Slade had committed the one thing that even the most gracious deity could never forgive. He had pulled a gun on an innocent soul…

"Starfire? Starfire, answer me," The Boy Wonder's voice was low and urgent, striking her ears with persistent fear. Star managed a tiny grimace. She didn't like hearing Robin afraid.

"Rich…Richard…" Starfire mewed softly. Her vibrant voice had dwindled to a paper-thin whisper. Robin tightened his arms around her. As if he could pin her angel wings to the earth just a little longer… as if he could keep her with him just a moment more…

The other titans were in motion now. They shook free of the horror that had stilled them upon hearing the shot and watching the gun flare and seeing Starfire's body jerk when the bullet dug itself into her. They seemed to appear at Robin's side within seconds of Starfire's utterance, hovering with heavy distress in their faces. Raven was rhythmically muttering her mantra over and over again as she let her eyes flicker from Star's wound to her paling face.

"Starfire… oh God, Starfire…" he choked out the words. "You're going to be ok; I promise you're going to be ok…" Starfire dragged her eyes open slightly. Again, she was upset by the tremors running through his voice.

"…Robin," Cyborg warned. He could see his leader teetering dangerously on a reckless outburst. The android's robotic eye scanned Starfire's body. He swallowed a lump of bile that rose to his throat as the computer half of him bluntly twittered that the alien girl had suffered a fatal hit. She would not walk from this building… not without a miracle. Raven knew this without a scanner and she bordered on hyperventilating, wrestling her emotions and trying to subdue the horrible desperation slithering through her limbs.

Beast Boy let out a tiny sound that was muffled by tightly pressed lips. More death. More death was coming. Starfire's chest rose and fell choppily, her mind swimming and blurring. She fought the darkness that caressed the edges of her being. It was cold and she didn't want it. But it wouldn't leave and it was slowly working its seduction. The cold could soothe the flaming pain that was immobilizing her. "_Robin!"_ Starfire shrieked suddenly. She couldn't give in. Not yet. She couldn't leave him… didn't want to leave…

"Starfire… dammit, Cyborg, we have to get her home!" Robin's voice sliced the frighteningly breathless stand-still that was paralyzing the titans. Beast Boy nodded furiously. They had to get her home. They had to make her better.

Raven was clutching her temples, eyes closed. Starfire's aura was fading so quickly… so quickly…

"Robin she's…" Cyborg stopped himself and turned suddenly. He forced himself forward. They wouldn't give up hope just because the situation was hopeless… It was the often childishly naïve hope that kept him human. So he hurried towards the T-car. Robin was moving swiftly after him, trying his best not to jostle Starfire as he rampaged towards the t-car. The others were quickly following.

"Raven, can't you heal her!" Robin blurted as Starfire let out a rattling sigh of breath and whimpered.

"Her wound is too extensive… I can't… my emotions… I'll blow us all to pieces… I can't…" Raven let out a frustrated growl, stumbling after the rushing team with her fingers still glued to her temples.

"Robin… I…" Starfire murmured softly. Her beautiful amber skin was ashen.

"Starfire, don't talk… don't talk…" he mumbled, sending her a pained glance. He ripped his gaze from her slender fingers, curled over her wound and caked with drying blood and wet with new blood. A human would have been dead by now. But Starfire's Tamaranian body had bought her an extra fifteen minutes… and the fifteen minutes had dwindled to five. They were almost at the T-car when Starfire began to speak again.

"No… I have to… Robin… I am not… I am leaving…" she slurred, panting after the labored words and wincing as more pain bolted through her. Her jade eyes flooded with tears. The hurt was agonizing.

"Star, don't talk like that... Kori, you're not going anywhere!" he insisted stubbornly. Just a few more steps to the car and they could go home and save her. They would make it. They had to make it. The shot played in his head again and again. The call, another cryptic clue laid by Slade and a confrontation… and Slade had decided to drive a dagger into Robin's soul… with a bullet that had lodged itself deep within Starfire.

"Richard… listen… please listen," Starfire pleaded weakly. Cyborg unlocked the car. They all piled in with a single motion. Raven was in the back with Robin and Starfire and her eyes flickered open just long enough to gather the look of utter despair rolling onto Robin's face before her head pounded and she had to return to concentration. Block out her aura. Block out what's left of her aura. Don't feel her die. Raven suppressed a dry sob. No emotions. She shook in her seat.

The car roared to life and they screeched towards the tower. "Richard… I am sorry… I will not… be here for you… but you… you must know… you must believe… I-I love you… so much… I am… never really gone… I love… you…" Starfire labored to say it. Her eyes grew glassy then and slid closed. A final hiss of breath escaped her lungs. And Starfire was still. The t-car shuddered to an abrupt stop in the vacant road. The car was silent. The occupants were silent. The night was silent.

And a shuddering sob shattered through the air and whipped through the car. Not a tear had been shed since the day his parents died and now they flowed freely, sliding from under his mask and running down his face. Despair in every shaking heave of breath that left his body. Raven's body went limp. Her hands fell to her side and her eyes opened. She stared forward. She didn't see. All that was perceived was the absence of Starfire's beautiful and innocent aura and the ruined sobs of a broken man.

"I love you too. Starfire, I love you too… I do… I… Starfire, my Starfire…" Robin clutched her to him and tried to make her hear. He tried so hard. His kisses fell on cold skin, his voice vibrated on deaf ears. She was gone. She was really gone.

Beast Boy cried. He didn't care about the tears. He cried unashamed. Cyborg was still as stone and his human eye glistened with tears that he would have shed if he could have. Raven was blank. And Robin… Robin sobbed for them all, for himself, and for Starfire and the love he'd never given her until it was too late.

A titan died that night. But it wasn't really Starfire. She lived on in every heart. The whole city was saturated with her memory. The tower was filled with her caring essence. Her voice, "I am never really gone…" echoed in every ear. The one who died had been killed by her final words. The one who had died was Robin. And Robin's spirit had died with a finishing "I love you."

* * *

Author's Note: Ah yes, you have now entered the zone of tragedy. Or at least, the best tragedy I'm capable of producing. I often think any skills I may possess end in the more light-hearted or lightly angsty realms and vanish completely when I reach into the deeper tragedies and such. This whole collection is bringing a lot of firsts... today's first would be: my first time killing one of the titans off in a story... Anyhow, what did you think? Reviews are appreciated! I'll post again next weekend... maybe I'll post tomorrow... I don't know. Either way, I hope you enjoyed it?

Love,Princess Starfire of Tamaran


	5. Part 2: Tears: Once Felt, Always Needed

**Part 2: Tears Once Felt, Always Needed**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

Beast Boy is leaving. He has no reason other than that it is something he must do. Raven respects that. But it's hard to let go of the things you don't have. BBxRae

_A/N: I would like to remind everyone this is a TRAGEDY section, therefore... do NOT expect happy endings. Not all of them deal with death, but for the most part... they won't make you smile. This fic. in particular may not be that sad, per say, but it is not going to make you laugh. I don't think. So please consider the fact that you are not about to read something that will make you feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. That goes for all of the "Tears" section fics. Of course, I will remind you that these are not ALL tragedies. After Tears a different genre will be explored so please do not leave any comments telling me you did not like the fact it was sad or that I must bring so and so back. It's sad on PURPOSE. Other well-considered critiques are appreciated. Thank you._

* * *

Tapping against the window frame, raindrops clattered a curious tune. They slid across the dusty glass and painted pictures with wet fingers. Wind howled through the night and hissed, spitefully, at the tower. Its shrieking laments assaulted the great structure and even this wonder of human engineering was submitting to the storm in its own subtle ways. Soft groans of steely voice whispered through every room of the structure. It was within this building that a figure sat, staring pensively out at the angered storm throwing itself across the city. The falling sheets of rain had struck up a jarring rhythm for her thoughts.

She was shrouded in a river of royal fabric, velvety soft and of the deepest navy. It was a starless night hung over her slight shoulders. A hood blossomed off of the long and obtrusive cloak and nestled her head in such a fashion that one might perceive she took solace in its dark folds. The room in which she sat was void of any light save the soft wash of pale glow set off by a single, flickering candle which perched on a tiny brass saucer. The saucer was a very old fashioned sort of relic with a slender handle curving gracefully off one side and looping back down to the base. It was silly that in such a modern age she would rely on the light of a candle to illuminate her quarters, but then again… with the storm screaming and spitting as it was, it was quite probable the electricity was out.

No matter, she was a child of the dark anyhow. She watched the flame sway and bob for a moment and pondered her teammates for a brief moment. All likely to be asleep in their beds at this hour, snuggled deep in an ocean of blankets and attempting to drown out the squall with pleasantly flitting dreams. Her clear indigo eyes hazed over for a moment as she methodically sought out the auras of each of her friends. Though she took pride in considering herself as regal and aloof, she could not help but internally sway to the tiny part of her that was still very much a child and whimpered protest against the violent storm. So, to satisfy this tiny and barely detectible part of her being she let her mind touch the essence of each of her friends and linger, just to reassure herself that in no way was she completely alone.

It was towards the end of this slow and methodical reach to each of the tower residents' auras that she lightly curled her mind around that of Garfield Logan. Beast Boy; the impish little shape-shifter. Having connected with the auras of each of her teammates before, feeling his aura was nothing new. However, it was such a novel sensation each time. The aura of the clownish boy was not the wildly vibrating hum of energy she had assumed it would be the very first time she'd reached out to it but rather a soft mellow chord that mixed locked up secrets and a bravely affixed mask of childish bliss. This paradox of emotions was something which created an odd sense of peace within Raven, and she liked it. The balance of pain and hope in his soul plunged the dark girl into a whirl of misplaced serenity and it was for this reason that she flitted her mind about his aura for a little longer than she would have the others.

Perhaps it was this lingering of her mental prowess on his aura or perhaps it was a blind hand of fate which brought her the vision, but none the less it came. Raven had contented herself to draw back from her checking of auras and she took two delicate fingers and snuffed out the candle, ignoring the tiny burst of white heat the snapped at her fingertips with the motion. She set the flameless candle aside and stood from her curled place by the window, stretching and closing her eyes as her back cracked and popped and rid itself of kinks. Raven slowly rotated her wrists; first one and then the other, letting her head loll back and stretch the muscles of her neck. The cat-like movements were stopped abruptly and her hood slid off as she brought her head back forward.

One hand reached towards her nightstand across the room by her black-sheeted bed. Two fingers were stretched out on this same hand and in a swift command she curled them back to her, beckoning the mug of now-cold herbal tea off the stand with a barely uttered "Azerath, Metrion, Zinthos."

The mug was wreathed in a light veil of obsidian energy and it wavered in the air, levitating sluggishly towards her. Raven's eyes were concentrated dully upon the object. She would have rather enjoyed the tea being hot, but at the moment even the cold quaff would suffice. The mug had tottered in the air to mid-room, and it was evident that the empath was hardly trying to move the object at all, because it seemed to bob and dance towards her rather than come in swift, business-like fashion.

At that moment, Raven felt a soft pressure on her mind. Her pupils dilated and it felt as if her blood had frozen within her veins. The mug was dropped from her control and it clattered to the floor, leaking out its contents. A rumbling surge of her power radiated around her and made the air thicker and darker and almost tangible. She stood still like this for a good five minutes before her eyes refocused and she inhaled sharply.

Her gaze flickered over the room swiftly as if she were trying to locate something. "Damn premonitions…" she muttered softly to the dulled howls of the storm outside. It had been intended as a cross, irritable statement but Raven was unhappy to find it sounded more worried than anything else. She swallowed. Moving her stare to her door she paused. One minute, two… with a black sigh she summoned her powers.

In one fluid motion her eyes had lost their indigo color and begun to pulsate with a brilliant haze-gray and her cloak swirled out to either side, flapping up like a pair of wings. Her body was engulfed in onyx power and she was contorted into the form of a shivering black bird of energy with unblinking white eyes. In this form and fashion she soared straight at her door, phased through it, and then spiraled straight up. She flew through the four stories remaining to take her onto the roof of titans' tower. Reclaiming her human form, the half-demon slapped up her hood and glared upward at the sky which was still disgorging ungodly amounts of rainwater.

Squinting through the fog of rain she saw the silhouette of another being on the rooftop. She lifted a hand above her head and a disc of ebony flowed out from her palm to create shield enough to block out most of the rain. Not that she wasn't already sufficiently wet from her brief stand on the rooftop so far. She shuffled across the rooftop, cloak brushing the wet ground, and came to stand a few feet behind the figure that could now be identified as Beast Boy.

He was soaked, his forest green hair limp and plastered to his forehead. Beast Boy's gaze was far off over the bay, regarding the bridge leading out of the city as if for the first time. Raven had known it was him before she'd even stepped onto the roof. She'd honestly guessed it before she'd even gotten the vision. In fact, Raven had been vaguely aware of Beast Boy's growing unhappiness weeks ago. She'd known, somewhere in her mind, that he would come to this eventually. It hadn't been welcome, though. She had wished it wasn't real and she'd chosen to ignore every sign until now. Now there was no more time. Raven didn't look at him, but rather let her gaze travel out to meet the place on the bridge on which his own stare was focused. She sucked in a breath, pulled her well-practiced monotony back up and spoke.

"So… you're… leaving tonight?" Raven asked quietly. Beast Boy jumped slightly and then turned to face her. Somehow he really wasn't that completely surprised…

"…yeah…" he coughed and looked away again. He shouldn't have deceived himself into thinking someone wouldn't find out. The fact it had been Raven should have almost been expected… and yet now that she was standing here he felt his resolve falter slightly. He watched her lower her hand and let her makeshift umbrella dissipate. Rain eagerly pelted the hood of her cloak and within seconds had pushed it off and proceeded to drench her lavender hair.

"Oh," Raven said. It was quite sad that she couldn't have thought of something better to say. "Where… where will you go?" she asked. Beast Boy regarded her carefully. She seemed almost child-like in the question. Almost as if she didn't want him to leave. Again, his resolve faltered.

"I don't know exactly… just… away. Away from here," he answered. Raven nodded slowly. She still refused to meet his gaze. Mentally, she flooded her mental senses out and basked in his aura. She needed that peace now. In a way, she knew it wasn't so much the feel of his aura that brought her peace as much as it was who the aura belonged to, but Raven wasn't one to think of such things. She wasn't allowed to consider where she might have subconsciously bestowed her affections.

_Don't leave. Stay with me…Let me help you grow. Let me show you I'm more than a cold-hearted girl. There's so much I feel. So much I feel for you… but I can't say it… please, please don't leave._ Raven opened her lips to say so. "Why… do you want to leave?" was all she managed. Raven withdrew herself from his aura and nearly shivered upon the realization she would never feel it again.

"I don't know, Rae. I guess I kind of feel like… I don't really belong. I need to leave. Maybe it's the memories… of… you know…" he waved his hand absently back in the direction that could be assumed as Terra's resting place. Raven frowned. She said nothing. The rain poured on.

"But you do belong," she said. _You're irreplaceable._ _If I were allowed to love…Beast Boy, don't you see that all I've ever been doing is hiding? Have you never felt me resting near your mind? Have you no idea that without your essence in the tower I can hardly think?_

"I guess. Rae, I really can't tell you why I need to leave. All I know is that I have to go. It's… just…"

"There are other people in the world besides Terra," Raven blurted. She bit her lip as soon as she said it. Beast Boy looked at her, a flash of longing in his emerald eyes.

"I know that Rae. I really do," he said quietly. He placed a hand on her shoulder. She didn't make him move it but rather locked gazes with him for the first time that night. _For the last time_.

"If you know, then why are you leaving?"

"I feel like something out there is calling me, Raven. There's something bigger out there. I'm not trying to say the titans haven't been an amazing family, but I think if I stay here… I'm going to be loosing something I just can't afford to let slide by," he said softly.

"Right… I understand… it's not like you're going to loose anything here, right?" she pushed emotion far away. Beast Boy's eyes were sad.

"No, I'm going to loose a lot. I know that. But some things… you just have to do…"

"You didn't tell anyone?"

"No."

"But you knew…"

"I guessed you might figure it out. You'll tell them, won't you? That I had to leave?"

"O-of course… Beast Boy, I…" Raven hugged her arms around herself. He didn't know how much she needed him. Beast Boy smiled slightly, suddenly the wiser one of the two, and he hugged her gently. If she decided to throw him off the roof for it, oh well. Some things you just have to do…

"Beast Boy, will you ever… will you ever come back?" Raven asked, this time abandoning attempts to keep her voice even. She'd known he was going to leave. But now it was truly happening. Now every ounce of her fear was real. She couldn't give him up when she didn't even have him. He was such a free spirit… so full of life. She admired him. He didn't know that though. He probably didn't even think she'd miss him.

"Do you want me to come back?" he asked her. Raven's head drooped.

"Yes…"

"Ok. I'll come back. Some day." He said. "For you." He grinned slightly and tilted her chin back up to look at him. She saw the lie in his eyes.

"I'll… miss you…" she finally managed.

"I'll miss you too, Raven. But you already know that," he said. Raven did know. She knew he had feelings for her. She knew she could have made him stay if she had begged it of him. But she wouldn't do that.

Beast Boy turned to leave, facing off the roof of the tower again. "So… I'll see you around… some day… right?" she murmured. Beast Boy nodded and then turned briefly back to her. He laid a very quick, very soft kiss on her cheek.

"I'll see you around," he replied before she could comment on the kiss. And then he leapt into the air as hawk and flew away from the tower. He was a few yards off and hardly visible through the thick rain that still fell. She could just barely make out his shape in a rain-halo. He hovered in place for a few seconds and wheeled around abruptly, soaring back over her head on his hawk wing and whistling a single shrill cry as a final goodbye. And then he left. Just like that. He just picked up and left without much reason and without much thought he was gone.

She knew he wasn't coming back.

She knew she wouldn't see him again.

Raven felt out with her mind and tried to reach his aura.

There was nothing but a cold void.

She shivered and slipped slowly to her knees, still staring after him. He would have stayed if she had spoken. If she had told him everything she had truly felt. She was sure of that much. Raven felt a new wetness on her face. Sliding down her cheeks. One tear. Two. That was all. She didn't cry more then that. Because she then and there ceased to feel. Emotions were no longer oppressed. They were simply gone. Because he was gone.

There was nothing but a cold void.

Because she had not spoken.

What once had been felt would be eternally needed…

And never given.

* * *

Author's Note: Are we allowed to answer reviews yet? If we are then I would like to... Um, either way. I hope you read the pre-fic A/N because all of that really needs to be considered... Or, I'd appreciate if it was. I don't know if this came out at all good or not because I've written it rather late at night. I appologize if it's not up to par. As always, if there are enough of you who dislike this particular piece I am willing to remove and rewrite/revise. Just let me know. Quickly speaking on the last chapter... no, I will not be reviving Starfire. I'm sorry. It made me sad too. But she's only dead in that chapter... in coming one-shots she will be very alive. Have no fear. Also, perhaps it was not last chapter but one before it, I am quite aware BB is not an elf. However, he does have elven characteristics and thus I occasionaly refer to him as such. It goes the same with calling Cyborg a robot as many pwople do. He is not really a robot but a cybernetically enhansed human. But I'm not about to tell people to stop calling him a robot. You know? Just wanted to clear that up and let people know I AM aware he's not acually an _elf._ Oh, by the way... it'd be much appreciated if someone would let me know when the knew teen titan episodes come out. I know it's sometime this month, but does anyone know an exact date?

Comments and critiques are welcomed. Sorry for the ultra long A/N. I might post more this weekend but you may have to wait until next weekend... I apologize.

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran

BTW: Eh, I feel like giving away cookies... so everyone... have a cookie. And a brownie... and a kumquat... or how ever you spell it...


	6. Part 2: Tears: Shackled Karma

**Part 2: Tears Shackled Karma**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

CyxJinx Their love was a battle of will and fear, each devoted to the other and devoted to their side of light and dark... eventually, something was bound to be broken.

* * *

Rose colored cat eyes flittered nervously over the night. It was starless and the moon was a mere sliver in the sky. The pale girl trembled and hugged herself tightly. Nothing would happen. Nothing would happen. She just had to keep reminding herself, and it would all be ok. Still, she felt the usual apprehension of standing atop her worst enemies' home base… The girl bit her lip and swallowed hard. What she did for a kiss… Jinx managed a bitter smile at this. She certainly had placed herself in an awkward position. What would the headmaster say if he knew she was dating a _titan_ of all people? Jinx sighed and shook her head, pink tresses rustling in their high pig-tails.

What was taking him so long tonight? She shuffled her feet, scuffing a combat boot on the ground. She would take her leave if he didn't arrive shortly. Despite his every assurance, the sorceress couldn't help but feel intense foreboding every time she made her midnight rendezvous onto the roof of Titans' Tower. Jinx stepped lightly to the side of the roof, her boot toes poking precariously out over the edge. In the minimal moonlight she appeared as nothing more than a shapely shadow with brilliant magenta eyes. She tilted her face heavenward and sighed. If there was a God, He surely hated her. The bright young HIVE student smoothed her delicate hands down her hips, pressing out the wrinkles in her indigo dress. The jagged edges caught the breeze and rustled about her mid-thigh, chopping at the view of her striped leggings.

"Jinx?" a soft voice floated to her ears. The fate bending wizardess turned and narrowed her feline eyes.

"Cyborg, you're late. You know I hate being up here like this," she snapped, gesturing a hand at the surrounding. Cyborg moved to her side, heavy titanium feet surprisingly stealthy as he walked to her. Jinx kept her irritated expression flawlessly, despite the affectionate grin the android titan was giving her. "Gnnnh… don't look at me like that!" she hissed, pouting and balling up a tiny fist. She was darkly beautiful, her scowl lighting her face the way most women were lit by a smile. Cyborg supposed that was the difference between villainess and any other femme fatal.

"I'm sorry, Jinx… I was… delayed by, you know… titan stuff…" he said it awkwardly and his one human eye shifted uncomfortably away from her. Jinx's expression faltered and then fell to soft bewilderment. Her fist dropped and she tilted her head to the side.

"Is something going on…?" her voice fluttered. Being endowed with the ability to bend fate itself, she couldn't help but succumb to the inclination that teased at her mind, whispering that she was not safe with him.

"Naw, come on… Jinx, you gotta relax. You know how I feel about you," he assured her, taking her slight form into his arms. Jinx looked up at him suspiciously. Cyborg smiled and planted a light kiss to the top of her head. The girl sighed and her frame drooped.

"I'm sorry… I just get so edgy when I come here. I know you keep telling me it's safe but I… this is enemy ground for me," she murmured. Cyborg nodded.

"I know. I'm sorry I made you come," he said. Jinx shook her head suddenly, leaning against his metal chest.

"No… I wanted to see you again. It doesn't matter what people would say. I mean, my job is breaking rules anyways… right?" she managed a giggle. Cyborg nodded and smirked slightly. Within his mind things were raging. Why was he doing this to her? Was it really right? What Robin had said… was it really the best thing?

He looked down at the petite girl in his embrace. She seemed almost frail, her delicate gymnast's form firm but thin. She had an aura about her that made her seem as if she towered over others and a passion for her line of duty that baffled him. But it was her zealous nature that he was attracted to, none the less. Jinx sighed and pressed her cheek to his shoulder. She didn't hear the nearly silent hiss of power unfold well behind her. She didn't notice the sound hidden shadows descending onto the rooftop from the air.

Jinx knew it was wrong. She knew she should have found love within the HIVE, but Cyborg was… he was just so alive. She admired him so much. His strength and hope amazed her. Nearly eighty percent of him could no longer be considered human and yet he still loved life with a vigor she found intoxicating. To say the least, she couldn't really bear to be away from him too long. It had been nearly a year now since Cyborg had infiltrated the HIVE and they had become close. She'd thought she'd fallen in love with Stone, the mysterious new student but she had been wrong. She'd toppled head over heels for a titan.

But even after his untimely discovery and the events that had pulled them apart they were drawn back to one another. And they had found they were both willing to go to great lengths to keep their ridiculed love alive. Jinx shivered. It was cold…

"Cyborg… why do you have to be a titan?" she asked quietly. "I-I mean, I don't really care what you are as long as you… you love me… but you could have been so amazing as one of the HIVE. Why do you choose to play second fiddle here when you could've had so much power?" she asked. Cyborg blinked. Before, it would have been easy to answer her question. Justice was more important than fame. What was right had to be valued over what was wanted.

What was right had to be valued over what was wanted.

What was right had to be valued over what was wanted.

Was that really true?

He stared into the radiant eyes of his dark love. "What's right… has to be valued over what is wanted," he said slowly. He wasn't sure he even believed his own words. Jinx bit her lip and looked down. Cyborg sighed and tilted her chin up with a finger, pressing his lips tenderly over hers. The kiss ended much quicker than either would have liked.

"But… who's to judge what's right?" she asked softly. Cyborg considered this for a moment and then his throat tightened. His gaze swept past Jinx and to the four slinking shadows making their way to them. The subtle click of Robin's bo-staff finally caught Jinx's attention. She jumped from Cyborg's arms and whirled instinctively to face the sound, fists aglow with pink fire. She stood panting for a moment, puzzlement edging into her eyes.

"It was nothing. You're just paranoid, Jinx. It's ok," Cyborg soothed. Jinx turned back to him doubtfully.

"But Cyborg I…" she stopped abruptly and gasped, reeling backwards as an obsidian form oozed up from the roof of the tower and took the form of Raven. Raven managed a pleased little smirk out of her monotone and then flicked both wrists forward. A wave of black power knocked Jinx to the ground. She scrambled backwards. Eyes flickering solid pink in and out. "Cyborg! What's g-going on!" She rattled out, not wanting to believe what she now knew was true. She hadn't just been paranoid. She should've listened to her instinct.

He had _betrayed_ her. Jinx swallowed hard and floundered to her feet, the emotions rampaging through her head were robbing her of her usual agility. "Hyaa!" Jinx flung a band of hex out at Raven. The cloaked heroine was prepared, though, and lithely levitated out of the way.

"Do not hurt my friend!" an angered voice cackled behind her. The Tamaranian princess hurled a starbolt at her. Jinx gasped and rolled out of the way, twisting to face Starfire's direction at the same time. She let hex fly from her hands. Wild emotion was still beating in her head. He betrayed her… She could feel her power surging and building. He betrayed her.

The hex hit the small overhang of cement above the door in front of which Starfire was hovering. The concrete crumbled and toppled Star to the ground. "Ah!" Star cried out as she was slammed with concrete. Robin grit his teeth angrily and came flying at Jinx with a rapidly whirling bo-staff. Jinx bit her lip and back-flipped away, flinging hexes at him every time she was in the air. Robin deflected each with his madly spinning staff.

Beast Boy charged from behind in bull form and he caught her off guard. She had been perfectly ambushed. HE BETRAYED HER. The hot tears that had been stinging her eyes flowed now as she hit the ground and rolled to the side of the roof from Beast Boy's blow. Jinx slid to a stop. "Cyborg… why?" she breathed as she pushed herself back to her feet. Cyborg was simply standing and staring at her. She tore her gaze from his and readied more hexes as the other titans flew at her.

Cyborg stood. He watched numbly. Who's to judge what's right? The words rang in his ears.

"AAHH!" Jinx cried out as Raven and Starfire sent a partnered attack of starbolt encased, black energy. She was hit and sent flying. Jinx plowed into the ground a foot away from Cyborg. The titans stopped. Jinx lay still. Cyborg remained unmoving.

"Come on, Cyborg… finish it!" Robin snarled. The Boy Wonder was already snatching out handcuffs from his utility belt. Cyborg remained still. Jinx panted and looked up at him. The titans couldn't have defeated her so easily if it hadn't been for him. She wasn't weak. They had needed his betrayal to catch her. Once she was locked away, the rest of the HIVE would be undoubtedly quick to follow. More tears. She said nothing. Cyborg slowly lifted his sonic cannon and aimed. Minutes passed.

"Dammit, Cyborg… this isn't that hard," Raven muttered and with a strong spiral of ebony energy she consumed Jinx and her frightened scream. The sorceress was released from her black prison seconds later and she was left quivering on the ground. Robin frowned at Cyborg and swiftly pulled Jinx into handcuffs.

"Cyborg, you're lucky the ambush caught her so off guard. If it hadn't been for that…" The Boy Wonder shook his head. "You said you could handle catching her. You weren't supposed to actually…" Robin sighed and ran a hand over his face as Beast Boy pulled Jinx to her feet, shackled and sobbing.

"I _loved_ you! Didn't that matter at all! I-I… how could you?" the pink-haired girl's angered screech dropped to a trembling whisper. She'd been right to be nervous about coming here. Night after night they had met and he'd blinded her to the real threat of being a villain and standing atop Titans' Tower. Had all his kisses been filled with deceit as well? This elicited new sobs from her. "Too cowardly to even give it a fair fight," she murmured bitterly, bleary eyes flashing with hurt and hatred at every titan. Starfire flinched. Raven was blank. Beast Boy wrinkled his nose. Robin scowled. Cyborg… hung his head.

"Jinx…" he stepped towards her and she recoiled like a wild animal. Cyborg stopped and lifted a hand, pain flashing through his features. The pale sorceress refused to look at him. "Jinx I really did love you too… But I had to…"

"Of course you loved me. That's why you're throwing me into a cell and chaining me to a wall," Jinx's bitter hiss coiled around Cyborg's heart. "You really are just a machine. A cold, heartless, soulless machine," she growled. Her shoulders were still jerking with soft cries and tears still slithered down her cheeks. Cyborg swallowed and stepped back.

"No, Jinx… I-I… please don't say that!" he pleaded. He deserved it though… and he knew that.

Jinx's tears abruptly stopped and she suddenly brought her gaze to meet his with burning hatred. "I might have accepted being thrown in jail just because I was caught. But you… you're making me see something real important. I _never_ want to have _anything_ to do with your side ever again. Tell me what kind of justice puts a girl in shackles for loving," she spat. Cyborg flinched. Her leering gaze flew hen to Robin. "Be sure to give him a kiss for me, won't you?" she snarled with a furious, Cheshire cat grin. Robin didn't react. He simply moved to take her by the shoulder and led her to Raven.

"Take her to jail." Robin said. Raven nodded. Jinx had time to send Cyborg a last, spitefully scalding glance before Raven teleported her away. Cyborg was numb with horror and his breath was coming rather hard. The remaining three titans looked at him. Robin's cold leader face slipped away. "Look, Cyborg… she was villain. You know you had to…" Cyborg lifted a hand to stop him. His face was stony. All the memories of his cherished moments with the beautiful villainess were shoved roughly away.

"What's right has to be valued over what's wanted," Cyborg said bluntly. He turned abruptly and left the roof. Left the haunting lingering of Jinx's perfume. Left his heart back with his betrayal. Left his thoughts of a radiant soul shrouded in black far, far behind with the distant and imperceptible whimpers of Jinx as she sat her new cell, shackled and denied love simply because of her allegiance.

He left it all and walked slowly to his room.

……..

…….

……..

…….

……..

…….

……..

…….

……..

…….

……..

But who's to say what's right? Perhaps only… the heart?

* * *

Author's Note: Ok, making this really short. Here's the nest installment... I have to go now 'cause my mom's going to get ticked. Um, please give me your thoughts! All your comments were appreciated and... I know it's not that tragic, but, um... yeah.

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran


	7. Part 3: Bittersweet: When We Never

**Part 3: Bittersweet When We Never Say Goodbye**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

Sometimes you just can't say goodbye...RxS

* * *

The rain fell, thin and dreary and black. The sky grumbled once in a while, proclaiming sleepy drawls of thunder to accompany the half-hearted flutter of lightning. It was hardly enough to call a storm, but it sufficed to dampen all the luggage set outside the tower, ready to be loaded into the car. From the doorway, two figures stood solemnly, their gazes intent upon the things laid out to be taken. Somewhere further within the gut of the tower, soft clanks and occasional crashes could be perceived as the final preparations were made to leave. One of the two standing at the open doorway sighed, soft and feminine, and turned its face away from the luggage as if it were too painful to look at.

Perhaps it was. "Must this all end?" the girl's voice quavered, as if desperately hoping this was all a strange dream. But if it was a dream, it was one which they had all been expecting for quite some time. They were older now, and it had dawned upon them all that the youthful bliss they had been living in was bound to come to a close.

"Yes. Yes it does…" her companion murmured. A young man, a few inches shorter than she was, with ebony hair that hung near his shoulders and rustled limply in the breeze.

"But Richard…" she started, tugging at a lock of auburn hair. She bit her lip. "I do not want it to end," she breathed, childlike. The "Boy Wonder," who was not quite a boy anymore, touched her shoulder lightly.

"All good things come to a close. Cy has big things waiting for him. He's ready to take over Titans East. This is good for him." Robin muttered. Half believing, half not. Starfire shuddered and hugged herself. She hated this. Why did this have to happen? Why did they have to leave?

"I am happy for him but…"

"I know… it's hard. For both of us," he looked at her then, and despite the mask covering his eyes she knew he was considering much more than Cyborg's departure. He looked less composed today. His hair wasn't gelled up as it usually was, and she realized it was longer than the last time she'd seen t out of his usual spiked style. Perhaps he was taking the break up of his team harder than he had thought he would, or maybe he was worried about returning to Gotham. Maybe it was both. Raven had left nearly a month ago, having felt she needed to go out on her own. She had decided she'd been using the titans as too much of a crutch for her own inner struggles and deemed it time to leave.

Since then, Beast Boy had made arrangements with the Doom Patrol and had gone and rejoined them. He'd realized early on what was happening to the team. And he didn't wait to see it completely fall apart. A week after Raven slipped away, Beast Boy took flight as well. That had left three. One was leaving today, one departing for Gotham tonight, and one utterly lost. "Robin, I… will miss them all so much…" Star closed her green gems and blinked back another trickle of tears tickling her eyes. "I will miss you so much…" she added. Robin swallowed and looked away.

He'd figured they'd all head separate ways, but he hadn't considered that this might actually mean he never talked to them again. He could keep contact with Cyborg, probably. … Maybe even Beast Boy. They had all been aware their parting with Raven had been final. But Starfire? What of Starfire? Of Kori? Of his joy? He glanced at her, pressed miserably against the doorframe and staring inward at Cyborg, who was finally making his way out of the tower with his last few duffels. The android came to a pause beside his friends.

"Well, this is it. It's been real, y'all. Don't… don't disappear on me, alright? Keep in touch. Seriously. You're like my family. I don't want to loose that. Not what I have left," he said quietly. Starfire let out a very pathetic little whimper and she flung herself onto Cyborg, wrapping him in a gigantic hug.

"Oh, friend Cyborg I shall miss you so dearly!" she babbled, trembling as the tears finally began to flow. Cyborg patted her back gently, and after a while she allowed him to move away. Robin offered the half-robot a slight smile and clapped him in the back.

"I'll be sure of it. The same goes for you… don't be a stranger. You know where I am in Gotham, ok?" he said. Cyborg nodded and returned the parting grin. With a heavy sigh laden with finality he scooped up his bags and trudged over to the T-Car. It was only moments later that the two remaining titans were staring blankly at the receding taillights. Starfire wiped the back of her hand across her cheeks to brush away the tears. She breathed deeply, glanced at Robin, and with a sharp exhalation she turned and went inside. Robin didn't follow, but his eyes wandered after her for a beat or two before he rubbed his temples and rather dejectedly closed the door and traveled to his room to put the finishing touches on his own packing.

The tower was utterly silent. He wondered where Starfire was. What was she doing? Would she stay on earth? Or would she leave him completely and return to Tamaran? The thought rattled around his head uncomfortably. He prayed this would not be his last time looking on her sweet face.

Starfire, on the other hand, had no attachment to the things in her room. She would leave them here and take only a few select things in her little pink backpack. She supposed she had no better option than to return home, and there she would not be in need of anything. But this place… this tower had become her home… and she would need her friends. The alien princess blinked a few times and stuffed some of her special photos into the bag with a little of her clothes and the teddy bear Robin had won for her at the fair. That had been four years ago, when she was only fifteen. She slipped the backpack on and then slid out of her room with finality in her step.

She let her feet carry her to the rooftop. A sad smile flitted to her lips as she glanced around the familiar place. This was the end of something beautiful, she decided. No more titans… and no more Starfire. She was Koriand'r again. The crown princess of Tamaran and nothing more than a slave to aristocratic formalities. She ambled to the edge of the roof and sat down, smoothing out her purple mini skirt and propping her chin in her hands.

Starfire didn't know exactly how long she just sat there, aching to go back in time and remain in the days when the titans were young and alive with the thrill of being a bright band of youthful superheroes. Technically… they still had their youth, but at the moment she felt very, very old. But either way, the sun was sliding below the horizon by the time a light hand on her shoulder tugged her out of her wistful thinking.

"Richard," she murmured, placing a hand atop the one he had rested on her shoulder. He shifted his feet behind her.

"It's time for me to go… Kori… Where will you be after this?" he asked tentatively. He'd seen her bag, noticed the meager amount she was taking and known almost positively where she intended to go. He was quite sure a very large part of him shattered when he had seen her sitting alone on the rooftop, incredibly small and incredibly unhappy in the dying light.

"Tamaran, I suppose…" she said. It was more of a whisper though, for her voice was, like the rest of her, much too depressed and much too tired to do much else. Robin moved and sat down beside her, and for a very brief moment they held their breaths and were able to pretend that this was just like the many other evenings they had sat together. They could pretend their friends were still waiting in the tower and that they had forever together ahead of them. But this sweet second was nothing more than that. A second. Star turned regretful emerald eyes on him. "I shall miss you so very… very… much. I-I wish I had said things long ago that I am ready to say now. I wish there was still time to change the way things are," she shook her head and a small, crystal tear slithered down her cheek.

For what felt like the millionth time in the last few weeks she was crying again. Crying for herself and crying for him. Robin shuddered out a breath. "There's always time, Star. There's always time." He protested.

"No. Not always…" she presented him with a bitterly broken smile. He frowned and tugged her into his arms, hugging her tightly then. She sniffled and allowed him to hold her, melting against him and fiercely hugging him back. Robin didn't know what to say.

"If you go back to Tamaran…" he started.

"I shall never see you again. In all honesty, I shall never see you again." She choked on the words. It was if they strangled her.

"I don't want you to go back." He said suddenly… bluntly. Starfire looked up at him, frowning.

"I have no where else to go…" she replied, confused.

"Y-yes you do… you could come with me. To Gotham! Bruce won't mind… he can't mind… I won't let him. Kori, please stay with me," he spouted out the idea with rapid words. Perhaps he was being irrational? But it made her a little bit happy… either way.

"I could not impose further on you. I have already been such a burden these last years… despite our friendship I know I must have been most cumbersome to you," Starfire sighed. It was the truth. This was probably good for him.

"Kori… no. Star, you've never been a burden… at all. In fact you've always been exactly what I've needed. Maybe you can call me selfish for saying this but I… Kori I never want to say goodbye to you," he said urgently. Starfire stared at him. Minutes passed.

"You would truly wish for me to stay with you…? This… is not a light matter… this is the next chapter of your life…" she murmured. Robin nodded. He knew. Oh he knew… and he wanted her with him. He always had. Always would. Maybe he was speaking a little late but he really could care less. All that he wanted was to have her with him as he went back to Gotham. All he needed was her and he could deal with the fact the titans had split. He could manage if she would just stay.

His rampant thoughts were cut short by a gingerly placed kiss to his lips. He blinked rapidly, uncomprehending. Starfire pulled away and looked at him queerly.

"Is that what you wish for? Do you… I… do we feel the same?" she asked. Robin's lips parted and he nodded slowly. Of course.

"Yes… I can't say goodbye to you…" he breathed, pulling her to him and kissing her boldly. Starfire shivered against his kiss and clung tightly to him.

"And of Tamaran?" she inquired. Robin's face grew solemn.

"Starfire, I want to be with you. That's all I know. I don't care what that may mean. If you really… honestly want to go back to Tamaran then take me with you. Gotham doesn't mean a thing… it's just a place. I'm home with you," he insisted. This brought a slight curve to her lips and she tilted her head to the side.

"Richard… I never wish to bid you goodbye either," she said. For every beautiful ending there is an equally beautiful beginning on the horizon, so long as you remember to never say goodbye.

* * *

Author's Note: Well, here's the next installment. Sorry for any grammer/spelling errors... I had to retype it all and I don't know how I did. Hopefully it's alright. As you can see this section is kind of... angstish I guess. Um... if you haven't read the season five episode descriptions you should go to and take a peek. What do you think? I'm not sure of my opinion on it yet... I'll have more on some stuff I heard in my next A/N. For now, thank you for all of the reviews and any new comments or crit. are appreciated!

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran


	8. Part 3: Bittersweet: Butterfly Tears

**Part 3: Bittersweet Butterfly Tears**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

Raven's never thought much about what other people saw her for. But then she went on a walk on a lovely fall day and met two little girls. And somehow it opened something she hadn't wanted opened and she's breaking down slowly and alone. But then there's Beast Boy... who always knows the perfect time to buy a muffin, and get philosophical about butterflies.

* * *

Raven inhaled sharply as she strolled along, crisp fall air fluttering over her face and playing in the folds of her cloak. The sun bathed her figure and serenity invaded her being. Cars ambled by, inching along in bumper to bumper traffic. City smells crawled over her senses. It was beautiful out, and the dark girl had taken it upon herself to forcefully enjoy it. Raven didn't indulge often, and when she did it always proved to be more of a struggle than she felt at all worth it. The thought tugged her indifferent lips downward a bit.

The life of a half-demon, she supposed. Her indigo eyes dropped down to the sidewalk as she continued her aimless wandering. Raven's breath curled palely from her lips, a sigh dying in the air just before her. She passed a café and a movie store before her eyes left the cement rolling beneath her shuffling boots. Her head lolled back and her gaze pierced upwards at the light-hearted sky, fluttering bangs slipping back and teasing the drawn-down hood of her cloak. A curious glaze shimmered at the corners of her searching eyes.

It was… so beautiful today… and yet here she was, thoughts heavy and sullen and her path taken alone. Why was she so very, very alone? It was dreadfully unfair. Raven hugged her arms about herself and bit her lip as she wandered down a secluded side-street. She heard a noise to her left and paused. Two little girls stood staring at her with big brown eyes. Twins. They stood, pinkies linked, and their little red jackets fluttered in a puff of breeze. Raven stopped and tilted her head to the side, staring at the two blankly. She breathed slowly, and, on impulse, attempted a tiny smile.

One of the little girls gasped and skittered closer to her sister. The other one whimpered. Raven was taken aback. …what…?

"Are you… r-really… _her_?" The little cherub-twin to the right inquired. Raven arched an eye-brow slowly.

"Um…" Raven responded. "What do you mean 'her'?"

"T-The Raven titan?" chimed the twin on the left. Raven nodded slowly. Both girls quivered and huddled closer still. "S-so… you're the… witch?" breathed one. Raven could hardly tell which. Rather, she felt any possibility of "enjoying" the afternoon slip away and die very suddenly.

"I… I'm not a… well… I…" Raven struggled.

"You are—aren't you…" both of them murmured in unison. Raven looked away.

"I'm not a…" she blinked and trailed off, frowning as she returned her gaze to the spot the two children once were. Little feet echoed as the girls fled the alley. Raven's petite shoulders slumped and she felt something in her cringe. "I'm not a witch… I'm just… cursed…" she muttered dejectedly. With half-closed eyes she trudged her way further down the street. As she returned back out onto a main sidewalk, she found herself uncomfortably aware of the various stares sent her way. People stopped getting into their cars to take a second look at the dark teen and mothers discreetly tugged their children closer.

"What are they so afraid of? I'm a titan too… aren't I?" she grumbled as she made her way into a little stone courtyard set up behind a bakery. It was surrounded by lattice laced with ivy and jasmine and soft, classical music drifted from hidden speakers. Raven found herself a bench and dropped down onto it. Was she really that frightening? Her lips pressed into a bitter line and she hugged herself again.

_No emotion. You are not affected by what others think. Besides, you deserve it. You're pathetic to think otherwise. Have you tricked yourself into thinking you could ever be wanted?_

Raven grit her teeth. _No emotion. No emotion. Just two stupid kids anyhow…_She blinked once, twice, and brushed away the tickle at the back of her eyelids. It was nothing. Raven surveyed the various shrubbery planted in little areas around the court yard and noted a small, half-dead rose bush hiding behind a few fresher looking plants. She narrowed her eyes and directed a finger at it.

"Azerath…Metrion…Zinthos," she drawled. A single, wilting rose was encircled in a halo of obsidian and tugged free of the bush. Raven summoned it over and let it fall into her waiting hands. A very small smirk. Heh, they really _were_ just stupid kids anyways. She fingered the sickly rose. A beat. "ouch." It slipped forth suddenly and one hand jerked from the rose. Raven stared dumbly at the little trickle of blood slithering down her finger. She eyed the rose and then the little thorns below the bud. Stupid rose. She tossed it away rebelliously.

Curse this stupid place and all its stupid people and… and… Raven swallowed. _You are the one who is cursed._ Her gaze grew dull and lifeless. She'd fooled herself. Thinking she could ever trick herself into enjoying anything. The discarded rose was again bound in ebony magic, this time unintentionally, and it was puffed into a fine dust of petals. It was all so frustrating. Bottling up everything was just so… frustrating. She couldn't even take a damn walk without being looked at like she was something disturbing or—or creepy. She was constantly under the watchful eyes of the world and it couldn't be satisfied. Raven was doing her best. She really was. She was trying to be the hero. She was trying to be something of worth but it just… wasn't working. She could never please anyone. She could never be… accepted…

Raven's eyes flashed, suddenly angry. It wasn't like she needed them though. It wasn't like _she_ could possibly care about this place anyways. She stood abruptly, fists clenched. Stupid city. The tickling sensation at the back of her eyes again. Raven uttered a low growl. This. Was. Pointless. She took a deep breath and then another. Her lungs heaved in large gasps. She was not upset. She was not hurt. She was perfectly unaffected. That's right. No problems in the world. She didn't need to please anyone. She was perfectly secure in every way.

"Raven?" A puzzled voice bubbled behind her. Raven flinched involuntarily. Dammit. "Hey Rae… what are ya doing here?" Beast Boy's voice slurred again. She turned to face him and Beast Boy's green eyes widened, immediately concerned by the uncharacteristic, distraught look on the girl's face.

"Am-am I not allowed here or something?" she asked. It had been meant to sound sarcastic but… it came out as more of a depressed whisper.

Beast Boy was still staring at her with big eyes.

"What?" Raven took an uncomfortable step back from his intent gaze.

"Raven… are you alright?" he asked. Raven frowned.

"Fine. I'm fine. Why?" she replied, becoming wary. What was he getting at? What did he see? She was fine. She was fine.

She was _fine._

"Are you sure? Because…"

"I'm positive." Raven cut him off. She averted her gaze. Why was he so curious all of the sudden? She picked at the hem of her cloak. A sigh. "I-I need to go. Meditate or something…" she said suddenly. She suppressed a sudden jolt of panic that darted through her veins. What if the titans had become tired of her too? Did Beast Boy want to know if she was ok because they were going to kick her out? Was she overreacting? Why was she getting so upset about today anyways? ARGH! Stupid, stupid _thoughts!_

"Raven… I think something's wrong… really. Do you want to talk about? 'Cause it's ok if you just need to let it out or whatever…" Beast Boy tilted his head to the side as he crumpled up the muffin wrapper in his hand and let it drop into the trash can beside the bakery back door. Raven seemed really out of it… he wasn't sure what could have caused it. She'd been fine when she'd left the tower. Had something happened? But Raven didn't usually let things affect her… at all…

"I said I was ok, didn't I?" Raven snorted, drawing up her familiar barriers. She was being much too sensitive. She needed to get away and just… meditate. Close things back up again…

"Raven…" Beast Boy sighed. Why did she always insist on being so difficult? Stubborn girl… Raven started to walk away. "Raven!" Beast Boy grabbed her shoulder and she turned abruptly, glaring.

"What's your problem? Can't I go meditate in peace?" she asked. BB stared blankly at her.

"I want you to talk to me." He said. Raven sighed and looked away.

"I don't want to."

"But I want you to."

"Beast Boy. Please. Not right now."

"Why?"

"Because I've been scrutinized enough today."

"What?"

Raven closed her violet eyes.

"Beast Boy, just… leave me alone. I-I need to… evaluate some things."

"Raven, what are you talking about?" He asked, his stare genuinely concerned. Raven bit the inside of her cheek. Dare she speak? Beast Boy continued to simply watch. The half-demon swallowed hard.

"I just need to evaluate some stuff. You know… about… myself. I just wanted to go for a walk today, is all. But I was fooling myself. Because I can never just go for a walk. And that-that bothers me. I want to be able to just… go for a walk and not get so… messed up sometimes. That's all. So I need some time to think." Raven mumbled. Beast Boy scowled.

"What happened?" he asked. The girl shrugged. "Raven, why won't you talk to me?"

"Look, it's really nothing."

"Talk."

"No."

Please?"

"No."

"Raven, I care… please talk…"

"I-I…"

"Please? Raven…"

Raven shivered. "I-well… it… I was just trying to walk. You know? E-enjoy the afternoon. And then… these two little girls. Beast Boy, they were so cute… so sweet and innocent…" Raven trailed off.

Beast Boy stared. Raven wasn't usually the type to call something sweet… let alone some_one_. "Yes?" he prompted gently. Her face contorted into an undeniable mask of self-loathing.

"They called me a witch and ran off. I didn't even _try_ to scare them. They just… they just were. They called me a witch. A witch. I-I know people look at me funny but I never really… considered what they thought of me… until I was just walking. Trying to be normal and they…. They… what does everyone want from me? What am I supposed to be?" The stoic girl burst out. Beast Boy was taken back.

"Raven, you shouldn't care what they think of you. You know what you are. You've always been so secure in that. Why all of the sudden…"

"I don't know. I just don't know. I guess it's all just been building and I can't—I don't think I can take too much more. I really don't. I can't stand being so _creepy_ to everyone. Even… to you and the titans. I feel like I'm nothing but a burden or something. I've never repaid you all for the kindness you've all shown to me and I can't stand that…" Raven looked upward at the obliviously happy sun. Beast Boy exhaled.

He watched her for a moment. He didn't speak. Her frame seemed more wilted and her eyes were abruptly lost and confused. Everything she'd been holding inside. All the insecurities were being brought out because of the words of some immature little children. His lips parted. Had she been holding it all in that long? If she just let loose once in a while…

"Raven?" he said quietly.

"Yes, Beast Boy…" she slurred, not really wanting a lecture from the little changeling.

"Did you know butterflies cry?" he asked. Raven blinked and then stared dumbly at him.

"No they don't." she replied slowly, irritably. She didn't need this. She didn't want this. Why her emotions were suddenly buzzing out of line, she had no clue. She'd heard the name of "witch" applied to her but now… to hear it from little children… it… it…

"Yes, they do. Why would you say they don't cry? Is it just because you've never seen their tears?" he continued. Raven nodded hesitantly, wary. Where was he going with this? "You don't—you don't need tears to cry, Raven. You… don't need to let out much to cry. And it can… do an awful lot of good…" his eyes had fallen to the ground and now he peered up in an almost shy manner. As if he didn't know she would welcome his words. Raven stared.

She stared some more. Her thoughts were running wild. She really just… crying just… why was this sounding s-so inviting? She shouldn't…

He shifted his weight.

She stared, and her lower lip quivered minutely.

"…"

"…"

She let out a silent heave of breath and then plowed into him, shoulders shaking. That… succeeded in surprising him. He stumbled to support both their weights and then steadied. Her face burrowed into his shoulder. Her held her, awkwardly. "Rae…" he breathed. Raven didn't respond. She just cried, dry-eyed into his shoulder. Long minutes passed and she didn't move. Every strange look or fearful glance was wordlessly screamed. Every thoughtless comment or sneering remark was sobbed without any sound in a whirlwind of spontaneous release. Beast Boy hadn't really thought she would… listen to him. It was all so abruptly released, there behind the bakery. And Beast Boy just stood with her there in the courtyard, the sun grinning down on them and her body quivering against him in irrational sadness. He tentatively wrapped his arms around her, embracing her gently. She still did not move.

A very long time passed like that and Beast Boy began to realize this would take… quite a bit of time. And that was okay. So he simply held her a little tighter, assuring her of his presence, and very gently, so she would not notice, kissed the top of her head. Cold autumn air caressed the two forms. Beast Boy didn't move her and she didn't pull away. It was… strange that she would so suddenly allow herself to break-down, if only a little. Even stranger still that she would allow him to see it and help her with it. The green-skinned boy pressed his cheek against the top of her head and murmured a sound of consoling which seemed to make her body tremble even more.

He was suddenly grateful that she had taken a walk today. He was thankful that she'd chosen this courtyard in which to examine her hurts for the first time. He was thankful that he'd selected today to drop by the bakery and find her. He was thankful that he had, for the first time, to show her that emotions were sudden and beautiful in their atrocity. He could show her, if only a little, that she had always been needed and accepted and even loved. Beast Boy was thankful for Raven and all of the bottled up sorrow she toted with her.

And Raven cried her butterfly tears.

* * *

Author's Note: I... am... SO SORRYYYY! I didn't update last week due to HUGE writters block and then I ended up with nothing more than this really messed up THING that I'm TRYING to call a one-shot. It's not even bittersweet! GYAH! I feel reeeallly stupid but it's the best I could do at the moment. I don't specialize with bbxrae one shots... their relationship always needs more time to d-develope and n-now I'm gonna CRY:sobs:

Ahem. Ok, now that my little splurge of depression is over... I truly am sorry for the horrific state of this fic and I am highly considering revising it. As is usual, I leave that decision up to you, my dear reviewers, who I have so horridly treated by not updating for a whole two weeks. I do hope, however, that you will be kind enough to leave me with your comments whether they be critiques or whatnot I appreciate them all. Now, here is a very important note. I did NOT plan on writing a cyxbee or cyxjinx fic for this section. That means that unless I get a very odd burst of inspiration that contradicts my current plans, we are moving right along into section four. That is... the Starfire section, I do believe. I hope you all won't get too mad about it or anything. I guess if you reeeaally want a bittersweet cy fic I might be able to attempt it. But please understand I'm not very good with them in the first place...

Well, thank you for being so patient and for slaving through this chapter. I send my appologies to all of you. Perhaps BB will buy you a muffin from that niftly little bakery. :sigh: Oh! Before I forget, has anyone looked at my updated "potential stories" section of my profile? If you have... what are your feeling on the story Love me Senseless. I think I want to start it but I'm always a little iffy with begining AU fics... your thoughts are appreciated dearly! ((Eh, on another note... was anyone else disappointed with the Doom Squad? Although I LOVE little BB...))

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran


	9. Part 4: Starfire: What We Call Sparring

**Part 4: Starfire What We Call Sparring**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

StarxRob. Robin decides Starfire needs extra training after a battle mishap. But neither of them were quite aware of what _kind_ of training she needed.

* * *

I feel heat rush through my veins.

My blood is on fire.

Green fire.

My fingers curl, and go numb as blistering energy soars outward from my hands.

Two orbs of pure solar destruction flash and wink as halos over my fingers… my hands… my wrists. Before me, a great mound of toxic sludge quivers and gurgles. Plasmus. He turns the great acidic bubbles of lime fluid, which are the closest semblance to eyes he has, in my direction.

I grit my teeth, and my limbs quiver minutely, as I fling my arms forward and hurl a volley of emerald-bright starbolts.

"SKREEEAH!" Plasmus shrieks in response, sliming and stomping his way in a backward blunder from my bombardment. His jagged teeth click and disappear beneath a veil of maroon ooze, which serves for lips on his hideous face. Behind me I hear a steady building of voice. Quiet, and then bursting into sound, is Raven.

"Azerath… _Metrion…ZINTHOS!_" I fling a final strobe of brilliant green light and then throw myself further into the air as two blades of obsidian charm slice the air beneath me, and into Plasmus. There is something of an explosion in his upper torso, but he simply spits and hisses in his mutant way, and charges forward. Raven snarls and regroups her mental control, performing an aerial back-flip out of the way of a stream of acid spit.

I wrinkle my nose, frown and prepare to send down more of my starbolts in aid to the other titans.

It is a strange swirl of emotion that allows me to fight. Fury and joy gives me power and flight at once. I savor the emotion-bending feeling.

A starbolt forms on my fist and I hold it out, angled down at the vulnerable "head" of our adversary. My aiming is interrupted by a voice calling to me from the terra firma below.

"Starfire, can I get a lift!" the voice demands. I glance down, and without so much as an acknowledging signal I dive. My starbolt looses charge and my hands fling down to grab onto Robin's. He is pulled up from the ground and I am streaming at Plasmus, eyes narrowed. Beast Boy bellows and charges the monstrosity as a great triceratops. "Thanks, Star… ready… now!" he orders. I drop him. No second thoughts. He is prepared, and soon there are several ice discs whirring towards our foe. Cyborg chimes in with a shot of his sonic cannon that hits the ice discs and powerfully plows them into Plasmus' writhing hide.

Raven grunts and her eyes shimmer grey. An ebony orb consumes Robin and deposits him safely on the ground again.

Plasmus has paused, unsure of what has just been slammed into his back. It must have felt rather annoying to the thing. "SKREE?" Plasmus says.

"Freeze," Robin replies.

C-CRRRAA-AAKK!

Most of Plasmus has suddenly been solidified by the ice discs.

"Starfire, Beast Boy, GO!" Robin shouts. I take my cue and dive gracefully down at Plasmus. Beast Boy is now a Tyrannosaurus.

He head-butts Plasmus.

Ice shatters and flies.

I harness a wave of rage that I force to rise.

My vision is tinted green.

An inferno blazes behind my eyes and I release the streams of energy.

This is the finishing move. Plasmus should be defeated.

But something is wrong. I hardly have a moment to gasp and register Plasmus' freakish yowl of fury.

A toxic waste-formed claw shoots out at me. The green dies from my eyes and I blink wide. Everything disappears behind a veil of thick, burgundy mess.

My mouth is open in an unvoiced scream of some name that never could pass my lips.

Pressure everywhere.

I feel myself suffocating in this cocoon of Plasmus and I struggle viciously to be free. I hear something muffled, far beyond. My view of the maroon world is dimming and shifting. My struggles cease abruptly and I see…

Black.

TTTTT

Air explodes into my lungs and I snap to a sitting position with a wild jerk. Spots flash before my eyes and I am gagging.

Foulness is in my mouth. I feel as if I am encrusted with something absolutely noxious and incredibly unbearable. My form heaves and shakes and then I still. A long breath of time whispers by. And then I sigh.

"…Feel better?" Raven's voice drones somewhere to my left. I do not answer until all of the spots stop bubbling before my eyes. Then I speak.

"Y-yes…? What… where….?" I turn stiffly to face Raven, a questioning look plastered over my face. Raven is leaning on one hip, her left hand propped on it and her right hand dangling lethargically at her side. She brushes a strand of violet hair from her face and readjusts her cloak, all the time staring at me with her blank eyes.

"You are in the Tower's infirmary. As far as 'what'… hmm… to put in the most eloquent of terms, you were… eaten by Plasmus' arm." Raven drones. I blink, and then my face contorts into something very comical and very disturbed. This seems to amuse Raven, who shows that she is such by smirking… very slightly, of course. "We defeated him and pulled you out a few minutes after he grabbed you. By then you were unconscious. Unconscious, but fine. None the less, I suppose we're going to need to reevaluate that attack sequence. He's obviously a bit better at breaking out of ice confines than we assumed," Raven blinks, and then shrugs. "You can go take a shower if you want, you know…" she mutters as an afterthought. I flush crimson, and then nod furiously.

I scamper down the hall as quickly as I can, while still under the restraints of my Plasmus crusting, and am soon blundering into the bathroom.

I strip my clothes swiftly and topple into the shower stall, twisting the water on with an anxious hiss. As the warm liquid floods over my form I shudder a delighted exhalation. It takes a very brutal scrubbing to remove all of the horridness from my skin, but I endure it happily. I am quite enthusiastic with the task, vehemently intent upon the annihilation of all the mud-like, reddish purple mess.

My form is pleasantly soar as I slink from the shower, cocooning myself in a luxuriously soft towel. I want nothing more than to sleep away the thoughts of being swallowed by mutant arms. However, it is only early evening and I feel it is likely I will need to remain awake for at least a few hours longer. This thought makes me frown.

I have bundled my clothes up under my arm and am walking bare-footed down the hall towards a quick stop in the laundry room. It is conveniently on the same floor of the tower that I am traversing. I hug the towel tighter around my form and toss my wet bangs from my eyes. It is _very_ convenient that the laundry room is on this floor, because I am _cold_ now. I want to be in my room dressing into a clean uniform right _now._

As I enter the laundry room, my bundle of clothes vibrates madly and emits a string of chirping music. For a moment, I am perplexed. Then I recall my communicator and hastily dig it out the pile. I flip it open, one-handed, as I dump the rest of my things in the washer. All of this is performed while precariously keeping my arm pressed against the end of my towel as to keep it from abandoning my person.

"Y-yes!" I chatter out while performing my awkward multi-tasking. Robin's face flickers on screen. He blinks a few times, regarding the rather uncomfortable expression currently gracing my features.

"Er… right. Star, I need you to come to the gym as soon as you can. We need to go over some things concerning earlier," he says, referencing my being ingested by a limb. I simper and manage to close the lid of the washer.

"O-of course, Robin… I shall be there momentarily…!" I yelp as I step back and loose my footing on a puddle formed by the water dripping from my hair. I tumble to the ground, still madly clutching at my towel. "AIIEEE! … Oof." I proclaim, sprawled out on the floor. Robin is staring at me through the communicator with slight concern.

"Are you ok…?" he asks tentatively. I give him a weary nod and produce a terran 'thumbs up' for the communicator screen. Robin is quiet for a moment. "Alright. See you in the gym in a moment," He closes the connection and I groan, letting my head drop.

"Owie!" I hiss as my chin hits the floor. I scowl and drag to my feet. That wretched Plasmus has been severely detrimental to my mood. I manage to get to my room without too much difficulty, still clutching my communicator in my hand.

I dress quickly into a new uniform and then pause back in the restroom on my way to the gym to brush my teeth. I shudder to think _why_ there is such a foul taste in my mouth, especially under the circumstances that my mouth was likely to have been _open_ during my brief stay in Plasmus' oozing form. I cringe as I duck out from the bathroom and continue off to the gym.

Robin is waiting for me when I arrive, and from the way the gym has become devoid of all equipment, I have a queer feeling I know what he is going to ask of me.

"Starfire, what happened back there with Plasmus… that was unacceptable. You can't be so careless next time, is that understood?" he asks, using his 'leader voice.' I blink my big, green eyes and nod.

"Yes… I, er… apologize…" I mumble. I am look down at the floor and suppress a sigh. Here it comes… I know it.

"Anyways, I think you should train a little harder in respects to your agility," he continues. I wait for him to finish the inevitable sentence to follow. "So I think you and I should have a sparring mach this evening to start your extra training."

I try not to show my irritation. Robin knows very well that my agility is _fine_. But he is frolicking in his world of paranoia again, and I know this means the next week will be filled with many, many sparring matches. I reply: "You wish to spar now?"

"Yeah. Just a quick round this evening, but I want you up early tomorrow for an extra round before usual training. Alright?" he says. I wrinkle my nose. Why does he make it sound as if it is a question? It is not as if I can say no without the risk of making him very, very moody. None the less, I nod and trudge over to the opposite corner of the gym and then turn to face him.

He pulls out his bo-staff and extends it, twirling the weapon once or twice before standing ready.

I summon fury to my mind. My eyes flicker and then burn green.

Silence… and then…

Robin plows forward, bo-staff whirring like blades of doom. I sweat-drop, launch into the air, and pulse starbolts to my fisted hands.

FLASH! I fling two strobes of bright emerald at him.

Robin dodges the orb of energy. I throw another.

Robin deflects it with his staff, flips high into the air, and comes flying at me with a powerful kick towards my mid-section. I ballerina-twirl backwards, out of the way.

Robin lands back on the gym floor, briefly on all fours. I take the opportunity and toss a starbolt at him. It knocks him onto his butt.

I gasp and fly down towards him, foolishly under the impression I may have damaged the Boy Wonder. Very foolishly…

Robin is on his feet and tossing smoke pellets in my face before I have time to register what he is doing.

FWOOOSH… The smoke coils around me and I cough, spinning blindly.

WHAP! "Eep!" I shriek as his foot connects with my back and I am sent sprawling across the gym.

I grit my teeth, growl, and flip to my feet. I whirl to face him just as he charges at me with his bo-staff. I blast him with a starbolt and leap into the air, soaring over his head. I land behind him and shoot a very short stream of energy from my eyes, aimed at his back.

Robin expects my attack, though, and dives to the floor so I miss him. I am momentarily distracted with his recovery. I hadn't really considered the grace of my leader. He jumps to his feet and then comes flying at me with an outrageously swinging bo-staff kssing the air but inches from my nose. My eyes go wide and I am shuffling hastily back, moving across the gym.

He jabs the staff at my torso and I narrowly manage a back handspring that takes me out of the way.

For the moment. … Again I am hopelessly distracted. A very awkward moment to notice again how intriguing I find the intense expression on his face. I blush.

And he is swinging and jabbing at me with his infernal staff.

I dodge as rapidly as I can.

He is very… good at testing my agility.

As well as my sanity.

Jab, dodge, swing. Jab, dodge, swing. Jab, dodge swing.

I dodge, ignore his fluid movement and effortless attack… and dodge again.

We are steadily moving towards the back wall of the gym and I know it. I bite my lip and continue dodging, charging up a starbolt as I do so.

I fling it at him and he expertly frog-hops it and continues driving me back with his staff. Instinct yells for me to fly up and out of the way of his attack, but knowledge of Robin's ability tells me he'd have me pinned to the floor before that could work. I want to fly sharply left and out of the way of his demonic bo-staff, but this is an impossibility as I am flitting left, right, left, right in the simple task of staying out of the staff's path from moment to moment. As well as beating back the sudden waves of feminine thought that are deviously diverting my attentions from the sparring match I am effectively loosing.

Suddenly, my back meets the wall.

I gulp.

The staff flies.

WHUMP.

My eyes cringe open and I glance down. Robin's staff is held long-ways just below my shoulders, his hands gripping either end and effectively pinning me to the wall. I chuckle nervously and Robin lifts an eyebrow.

"…Starfire…?" he says slowly. I flush. "You should have been able to get out of the way early on," he frowns. My entire face is tinged with bright pink. His eyes narrow in accusation behind his eye-mask. "What's distracting you?" he inquires. I suppress the insane urge to giggle madly, because I am again studying his tousled black hair, sharp features, and curiously masked eyes. "Starfire?" he is scowling now, disapproval in the thin line of his lips.

Hehe… his lips…

And then I cannot help it. I am laughing like a deranged terran school-girl and wishing most desperately for a pillow to scream into.

This sparring match… has officially ended in my mind.

And I know I am likely to be in trouble.

Especially if I manage to get myself into another mess the next time we answer a call to duty.

Especially if it involves my "lack in agility" he seems to wish to have me improve upon.

But… he knows my agility is fine and that what happened today could have easily occurred to any of the others. So I laugh and laugh and laugh.

Because I am a very silly girl that cannot help but wish to swoon upon the sight of her leader.

Even when he is attacking her with a steel rod of potential hurt.

This is very inappropriate of me. I am a Tamaranian warrior princess.

And yet I am laughing and cannot stop, because something odd has triggered every fanciful thought I have ever conceived about the young man pinning me to the wall to come rushing back into my head. I am horridly embarrassed by my current behavior, but this simply adds nervous laughter to my current bought of giggles.

Robin is blinking rapidly and trying to fathom what has gone wrong in my alien head.

Perhaps he is concerned that I have gone insane.

"Starfire… um… can you try and be serious here? Please?" he asks of me, feeling very awkward to be holding a hysterical extraterrestrial to the wall with a bo-staff.

I suck in several gasps of breath and then, with very strong will power enforced, I quiet down and finally cease my chirps of hilarity. But the blush is not gone from my cheeks.

It is splashed there and I believe it shall not go away for some time. Robin's lips twitch. I beat myself inwardly. And then he gives in to a half-smirk. "You're crazy…" he tells me. I nod in furious agreement and he chuckles. "But you need to concentrate. Really. I don't want to see you get hurt again like that. Especially when you can prevent it easily," he tries his 'leader voice' again. I clamp my mouth shut and nod again. I will not laugh. But I must admit, if only to myself, that he looks so cuuute when he is fighting.

I wish to burst.

Robin is staring at me. "I guess we're done today… somehow I doubt you'll get anymore training done," he shakes his head, but I can see he is amused. I offer the most adorable look I can muster in attempts to console him. He sighs. "Jeez, Star, you're something else." He grins. I ponder this.

"Of course. I am not human, silly," I say. Robin laughs.

"Heh. Yeah. You sure aren't," he replies. I narrow my eyes.

"Is this… mockery?" I inquire.

"No. You're just… just…" he thinks his words over. "You're cuter than any humans I've ever met," he breathes with an entertained smirk. HAH! Me! I am not the one who looks absolutely adddooorrrable swinging that bo-staff from Hades! I have, reasonably, utterly disregarded any memory of my mishap with Plasmus earlier. My eyes glow girlishly. Heeeee! I giggle.

"I suppose I should thank you for the compliment, then?" I inquire. I believe I have experienced a very rapid change of mood, tribute of _sparring_, no less. Robin nods.

"Yeah," he murmurs.

We cease speaking, rather I simply remain plastered against the wall and Robin remains holding me there with his bo-staff. And my thoughts wander, drifting around many things and then inexplicably back to him. But that is how I think normally, anyhow. More blushing on my part. I then become quite abruptly aware that our faces have begun to travel suspiciously close to one another in these last few minutes, and that I can feel is breath fluttering very near me.

I think I ought to stop my face from traversing any more distance, but I am a silly girl and continue to drift towards him. Our eyes are locked, and both of us seem rather intent on letting the _other_ stop our lips from the impending collision because, in some form or another, we are reluctant to do so ourselves.

I believe Robin has become irritated. He never was one particularly gifted with patience. Because… his face is not 'drifting' towards mine anymore. Rather, it is racing at me. My eyes become very wide as his lips fly the last few inches separating us and land sweetly over my own. His eyes become equally wide. Neither of us move. We are frozen and my brain is whirring in a mad attempt to comprehend the fact that Robin and I are lip-locked.

Robin seems to comprehend what is going on a bit quicker than me. His eyes slide shut, and I am still mentally gapping at… at…

…

…

…

…

Us. I finally grasp the concept being presented to me, and that is good. It is very good because I am ceasing to _think_ much at all now. I vaguely register Robin's bo-staff clattering to the floor and his arms coming to encircle me. But only vaguely.

It is a very long time before either of us decides that breathing would be a nice thing to do. We pull gently away from one another. Rather… Robin pulls away gently because I am still flat against the wall. A beat.

"Yeah… definitely too cute to be human," he says. I am confused for a minute, and then I get it and giggle sheepishly. I sigh. I want to say something, but I am too busy trying to revive my mental processes. I believe Raven would say I am dazed. And that is all fine. Robin is recovered, I think, and speaks for the both of us.

"So, anyways… you'll come to the gym early tomorrow… for sparring… because y-you need to work on your… agility." He blinks. And both of us know we will _not_ be late for sparring tomorrow. Robin asks anyways. "You'll be here early, like you're supposed to be… right?" I giggle again and nod.

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Then it occurs to me. I could have pushed both him and his bo-staff off of me and freed myself from the wall… a very long time ago. I suppose I just, did not wish to.

I smile.

* * *

Author's Note: Hiii! Sorry it took until Sunday to finish this but at least I got it up this weekend, right? Lol. Well... I wasnted to thank everyone for the reviews! I thinkthis story hashit like... 180 or something like that. THANK YOU:hugs everyone: you're all so sweet! Hehe. But really, thank you. the support is really amazing. I am still considering the eventual adding of a cyxbee/jinx fic for the Bittersweet section, but I'm still not sure. I have to go study for exams now. Ugh. Well, any of your comments would be lovely. What did you think of the perspective? I don't usually do 1st person, let alone 1st person present tense. I hope it worked. Hehe. Now I just need to figure out what genre this would have gone in oO. Romance/cheesy? Mff.

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran

P.s.- whoever asked for the lyrics to the titans theme song... I don't know where you could find it, but perhaps it'd be in the transcripts section of That's my best guess...


	10. Part 4: Starfire: Blue Tears

**Part 4: Starfire Blue Tears**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

RxS. Robin is having another nightmare. Seems like he deals with them often. But he won't say so. He won't admit he's hurt. Because he's not ready to let anyone try and heal him. Or... he doesn't think he is. It's kind of hard to understand the love that's being realized tonight... but at least he's finally knocked on her door.

* * *

The clock at my bedside ticks slowly away at the time. It is night. I am swallowed in a cocoon of blankets. I see the insides of my eyelids and nothing more. But I hear much. The tick-tick of my little alarm clock and the gentle sway and swish of my rustling curtains. The night breeze teases its way through my half-opened windows. I am not sure if I am awake or asleep, so I settle into thinking I am at a serenely euphoric medium. I am cradled in the loving arms of slumber, but still tied to reality.

This is a very nice feeling and I do not wish for it to leave. I am surprised that, for once, my solitude does not frighten me. Perhaps that is because I know that just outside my door there are other rooms in which my friends reside. It is a very comforting notion to a being such as myself. The dark has never been an enjoyment to me. I know that some of my friends thrive in the dark, and thus I am slowly coming to understand that the absence of light is not always as terrible as I had perceived. Not… always… but still, it… the absence of light can never be completely good, can it?

I sigh and wilt deeper into my sea of sheets and blankets. My hair is splayed haphazardly across the bed and my feet are propped up slightly by a single pillow. I never did understand the terran preference of using pillows for one's cranium. I slip in and out of consciousness, tiptoeing at the edge of sleepy oblivion. My thoughts are incomplete and swim by, like flickers of light.

It is in such a state of being that I hear a whimper somewhere out in the hall. My eyes are open in an instant. I stop breathing for a moment or two, listing. Someone is crying. I bite my lip. I do not know who… all of us seem to be unfortunately prone to shedding a tear or two, late at night when we are alone with our memories. Whoever it is must be crying quite loudly, for I should not be able to hear such a small noise from within my sleeping chambers. And yet…

"**_NOOO!"_** A very sharp yell swings to my ears and my body tenses. I jerk up in bed. I am wide-eyed and statue-still. The night grows quiet again. I listen for more sounds, but am greeted only with the soft murmur of midnight noises. No more yelling. No more crying. I swallow, concerned.

Long minutes pass, announced by my clock faithfully. Finally, I lie cautiously back and snuggle into my sheet-cocoon again. My alien eyes cast a halo of green light out into the dark, illuminating my face like that of jade phantom's. I cannot go and comfort the soft sobs that have begun to drift through my door again. I have decided I know to whom these murmurs of sadness belong. There are three of us on this floor. Robin, Raven, and I. Raven… does not cry.

I wonder if she is awake. Perhaps she also wishes to console the forbidden sorrows leaking from our leader's hidden eyes. Truthfully, I have never seen him cry. But I have heard him many times.

I wish to hold him and chase away whatever demons that are tormenting him, but I know I cannot. It is not my place… and that absolutely slaughters my heart and soul. I bite my lip and let my eyes slide shut. I hope I can still sleep, despite the serenade of muffled sobs that are pricking my ears. At times, I curse my Tamaranian hearing.

Raven must have heard his yell, but she knows as well as I that he would only become more upset should either of us attempt to go to him. He has a strange attraction to secrecy, when it comes to matters of what he _perceives_ to be weakness. It is a wonder that he does not despise me for all of the times I have cried openly, for he seems to be so harsh when dealing with himself. Perhaps he is simply tolerant of the fact that that my people cannot hide our emotions. Any of them.

It is a long time before I finally return to my middle realm of wakefulness teetering on the edge of sleep. I will myself to step over and slumber. I breathe slowly, and finally… I drift away clinging to my last troublesome thoughts about the Boy Wonder's tears. He still seems to be under the impression that we do not know he cries at night…

…

…

…

My eyes fly open again and I gasp. Something has woken me but I do not know what. I sit in silence for a minute or two, my ears straining. Then it comes again. A soft knock on my door… insistent. I blink. Who ever…?

"Greetings?" I utter blankly. "Er… that is, enter please," I run a hand through my hair and stand, shuffling towards my door, bare-footed, as it slides open.

I stare stupidly. Robin stares back. I shift in my nightgown. He continues to just… stand. He looks… smaller than usual. I have always been aware that my leader is rather petite, but he looks very tiny tonight. "Robin?" I ask of him, gently. Any signs of the tears I know he shed earlier are gone. His cheeks are dry.

"…Star…" he says back.

I do not move or speak and I almost do not breathe. I am waiting for him to continue.

But he does not say anything else. Rather, I am suddenly engulfed in a tight hug. I jump in surprise but then stand awkwardly in his embrace, greatly perplexed. To my knowledge, I am the only titan who seems apt _initiate_ hugs. However, it is most definitely _Robin_ hugging _me_ right now, and I am bewildered.

More time slithers by and he simply refuses to move, not that I am trying to make him move… and he does not speak. I am blinking rapidly. Finally, I sigh softly and work my arms around him as well, hugging him back. His entire frame seems to deflate in my arms and he clings tighter. Or at least, I think he is clinging tighter.

"Robin?" I murmur again. What has prompted this late-night rendezvous to my room is somewhat beyond me.

"…Kori… don't ever… leave…" he shudders, his voice muffled against my shoulder. I frown slightly. Was I… intending on leaving? This is news to me. I do not think I intend on leaving. Have I forgotten some decision I made? No… I do not plan on leaving. Robin is talking again. "Nnngh… thank God… it was just a dream…just a… d-dream…" He mumbles to himself, holding me tighter still. My lips part.

"Robin… what is wrong? What did you dream? Dick, I am here… it is fine. Please, what is the matter?" I breathe, staring down at his mop of ebony hair. He seems hesitant to let go, but does so anyways.

"Nothing—it was nothing… I just… you…" he shakes his head and I cannot read his expression well, for his mask is still securely in place. I have seen the eyes that peer out from behind that mask. I wish to see them again. But it is not the time to ask this of him. He is upset. A dream, evidently, that has… frightened him? I do not know. He exhales.

"Dick, why were you crying?" I ask at last. He opens his mouth to speak and then stops, starts again, and then stops.

"I… wasn't…." he frowns now. I touch his shoulder. He is not in uniform, rather a white undershirt and black sweats.

"You were," I insist. He looks down at the floor.

"It was just a dream," he mutters, more to himself then to me. I twist a lock of hair about my finger.

"A nightmare?" I voice quietly. He looks away, back out the door and into the dimly lit hallway. He seems to be unsure of why he is here now.

"…yes, I… guess…" he looks back at me, and he is staring very carefully at my face. He studies me for a brief moment and then runs a hand wearily through his hair. "Sorry. I woke you up… I shouldn't have. I just—needed to… see…" he trails off.

"See what?" I ask. He shivers and then cups my cheek with his hand. My green eyes search his face questioningly while one of my hands moves to rest atop his.

"You… alive. Here. It was just a… nightmare… like you said. Sorry," he mumbles, suddenly backing out of the door.

"Robin, please," I say. He stops. His gaze questions me. "Do not be sorry. Everyone… has fears." I breathe. "Everyone has nightmares. Everyone cries," I reach out to him, bolder. He stands. He does not accept my outstretched hand. So I let it drop. I bow my head and hug myself. Why must Robin deny what we all know so well?

He has finally come to me, even if he is still trying to hide his tears, he has come to me. I want to help him with… whatever it is. I wish I was more accustomed to this planet and its ways, so I could know what he needs right now. But all I have is what I _think_ he needs. And I cannot force him to take it.

Will there be more nights like this coming?

Robin is still standing in the hall. "Dick, I want to help you so badly, but you will not tell me what it is that frightens you. You will not even admit that you _are_ frightened. Or were. I do not care. I just want to help you… give you whatever it is you need. I want you to stop having to cry by yourself at night. Do not deny it… I hear you. So often I hear you."

I look up at him and shake my head. I do not know what to do. "Why did you come here?" I ask him, motioning back to my room. I believe I know. But I need him to tell me. I need him to say it fully, rather than mumble broken bits of it to me as he leaves. His shoulders slump further. He is tired.

"Starfire, I can't," he says. He frowns. I frown too.

"Cannot what?"

"I can't tell you what you want to hear."

"What is it that you believe I wish to hear!" I ask, flinging my arms helplessly… irritated. He came here… he cried… he was hurting and he came here. A nightmare, some haunting memory… I do not care what it is I simply want to help him. With everything. Why will he not just say he needed… needed… Just needed…

"I can't tell you that I needed you. I can't tell you that I needed you to help me or hold me or whatever it is that you wanted me to need." His expression has grown distant and monotone. Robin knows what I want. And he will not have it. I feel something in me break. He turns around stiffly now. "I'm sorry, Starfire. I shouldn't have woken you up, just because of a dream. I was being stupid."

I watch him begin to walk away. I feel cold. Dick, if you do not need me then why did you come? Why do you cry? I want my blanket-cocoon back. "D-do you need… anything?" I call after him, my voice quiet and sad and almost desperate. I hate it.

"…no." he says. I take a few slow breaths of air.

"Then… do you want anything?" I say, hollow. He stops in the middle of the hall and looks back at me, something close to a scowl on his face.

"Don't say that, Kori," he warns.

"W-why not?"

"Because you don't mean that. You don't want that." He replies. I look at the floor and I feel my own tears coming. I just want to be able to sleep without hearing him torture himself alone. I do not care what that takes. I want him to stop hurting. It should not be _normal_ to hear him battling nightmares in that dark room of his.

"Perhaps not… I do not know. I just wish you would share your pain or… anything to make you stop hurting, Robin. Anything…." My words are disconnected. But he understands what I am trying to say. "I love you, Dick. And I want to see you happy. For real. I do not want you to be alone, even if it is not with me, Robin, please just find someone to share your pain. You have been through so much a-and I do not even know half of it. Why did you come?" I ramble.

He has come back to me now and his hands are gripping my shoulders. I look up.

"I'm sorry that I came. I really am. But Kori, the last thing I want you to do is love me." He growls.

"…why…?" I breathe, confused.

"My _pain_, Starfire… I can't put that on you. I can't. You don't need that. You're too innocent to have to have that shared with you,"

"B-but… I _want_ that. I want to share that hurt with you. Perhaps you do not need it. Perhaps you can bear it on your own but I would be s-so blessed to share your sorrows," I say back. Robin is quiet. "Dick?" I say, meeting his stare now. "I-If you would only share your hurt… I so dearly wish to share my joy with you…"

I wait for him to say something. Anything at all. He is mute. So I sigh and close my eyes. "When will you stop thinking about me and whatever ideas you have on protecting me… when will you do something that is good for _you_?"

"Maybe when I'm strong enough to let you help me. Maybe when I stop loving you too… I don't know." he sighs, defeated. My eyes are still closed.

"Y-you love me?" I ask slowly.

"…yes."

"Then will you try to let me help you? At least try, Robin… please?" I plead. Eyes still shut…

"Maybe someday. I can't right now. I know you want to help me and, God, Kori I know you can but I just… I'm not ready." At least he has admitted it. At least I know he _does_ need. He lied but—but he lies about many things. About how things do not bother him or hurt him. About how the titans are nothing more than a team to him. About how he does not cry or suffer from frightening dreams at night.

"When—when you are ready to need me, will you let yourself? Will you promise not to fight it when you are ready?" I ask. I open my eyes to see him nod. "And… at the very least, you will let me love you. Do not tell me you do not want me to," I continue. Another slow nod. "Even if you will not let me help you… right now… do you think you can keep loving me too?" I end.

Robin does not nod this time, but I know it is a yes because… he kisses me. Gentle and sad, but tenderly hopeful for himself. Hopeful that he will be ready to share soon. And it is hopeful for _us._ Because he will let himself love me, and I will love him until he is ready… and after he is ready.

Our kiss ends. I reach up and pull off his mask to study his sapphire eyes. I lean in and kiss him again. He never did tell me why he had come to my room tonight. At least, he never did tell me what he had dreamt. But as I look into his eyes, I know. I know because he is sharing it with me and does not know it himself. He is ready. But for him to speak… I will have to wait until he _realizes_ he has always been ready.

It is hard to express what has happened tonight, or what is going to happen next. I myself do not fully understand it, save that he loves me as I love him. And that someday I _will_ have the chance to help him. For now, these naked eyes staring back at me… these eyes he has shared with no one but me… they are the only blue tears he will let me see and I… I can live with that.

* * *

Author's Note: oO eep. I reeeaaally don't know what to think of this bugger. I kinda sorta hate it and kinda sorta love it. Heh. Way to be indecisive, right. Gawd, I totally spelled that wrong. I need spell check on the editing page. Whatever. I hope it was at least mildly understandable and I didn't give too many of you a migrain with my messed up logic that is just about as bad as Starfire's 'sleepy thoughts' when viewed fully awake. OOOHHH that sentence didn't even make sense. Grr. Well, I hope you'll all be kind enough to give me a little feedback. It's off to the next section now! I will eventually add that bee/jinxXcy fic in Bittersweet. Eventually. Blech.

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran


	11. Part 5: Raven: Perception

**Part 5: Raven Perception**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

Slight BBxRae. Raven's powers have always been viewed as fearfully dark enchantments, but the young empath can't help but consider that everyone is jumping to conclusions. Until they've lived how she's lived and felt what she's felt… what place do they have to call her 'dark' or 'creepy'? The reflections of a demon-bound sorceress.

* * *

_I am Raven… the Teen Titan. The witch. The goddess vomited up by a demon father. The Goth. The ice princess. The fading spirit._

_I am Raven, and Raven seems to be quite a lot of things. Yet I am one. One individual torn from the arteries of rage and spat into the world by way of a raped woman. I am the daughter no being would ever wish to have as a child. I have nightmares lingering in my eyes and slaughter tickling my fingers._

_And yet…_

_I am happy._

_Perhaps it is twisted and utterly blasphemous that I should find a few shreds of happiness in this life, and selfishly hoard them as my own. Perhaps, but I don't care. That is to say… I have always been, and always shall be, burdened with an unfathomable amount of guilt. And my obtaining of a little happiness cannot make my load any worse._

_However, happiness to me is a very different matter then that which is experienced by any other of our city's general populous. My happiness is tainted. As are all of my emotions. I have but one emotion that runs pure through my veins… and that is rage. I am very purely shackled by the bonds of Trigon and I can't deny it for an instant._

_It is an ever present weight on my mind. Still, despite the fact my meager happiness is a tainted one; I can't help but huddle in it and cling to it with a passion. It would be a lie to say emotions are forbidden to me. Rather it is the expression of any and all emotion that gnaws away at my psyche. That is why I cannot tell those who have given me my fragile happiness what miracle they have bestowed upon me. I am, in essence, a walking paradox. I am a very delicate balance of hope and death strung out on the most breakable of threads._

_You see, I can't express my emotions the way anyone else might. I'm forced into channeling every flutter of feeling in my hollow shell of a body and release it in the light-deprived waves of obsidian power that have become so closely associated to me. I'm not the only one with telekinetic abilities in this secretive little world. I'm not the only empath, either. I am, however, the only half-demon who feels by passing her emotions to inanimate objects. Understand then, exactly what my powers are. If you wish to call them powers at all._

_Perhaps it is the only way you might begin to perceive me in such the manner that I dearly hope you will. There is a very good reason why I ramble about being unable to show my feelings. Truly, there is. I suppose it is a very weak attempt at apologizing for my lack of affection towards my close friends. I am not sure. But still, I wish you could understand that I have tried. It doesn't work for me, though. I try and show a little happiness, a little concern and my mind goes numb. I loose everything. I am blinded by the emotion and I can't see that I'm acting foolishly or without reason._

_It's not something I can afford. I can't do anything without knowing its end. And yes… at most times, I know at least vaguely what will become of my actions. My visions supply enough to complete what I cannot deduct from logic. Logic is really the closest_ _step towards feeling for me. And I know it's so, so wrong. _

I hug myself and exhale slowly, steam curling from my lips… a ghost of my spirit drifting… drifting away. I look across the round table at which I am seated and arch an eyebrow at Beast Boy. He is watching me. I blink and look away. Just over his shoulder. And my gaze is far away and then gone. The sound of the other titans squabbling over the last slice of grease-drenched pizza dulls to a sleepy murmur in my ears. I am thinking again. Thinking and doing nothing else, but still aware of Beast Boy's steady gaze on my silent figure, searching me. Searching for what, I'm not sure. Perhaps he is simply searching for _me_. I would like to tell him that if he does find me, somewhere within the billowing fabric of my cloak, I should like him to tell me where I might find myself as well.

It is cold and the winter air kisses my pale face and caresses my hair with skeletal fingers. It doesn't matter though, for my physical self is hardly on my mind at the moment. No, I am still pressing through that which defines me and trying to understand. Trying to understand and relate.

_My powers are, in essence, my emotions. Or at least, what becomes of them. Please… is it at all possible for you to imagine? Every time I feel a flutter of joy rise in my being… every time I feel a tear burn at the back of my eye… I must suppress. I suppress and release. I burn away every feeling that slithers through my heart by transferring it to something, anything that can hold such things as emotion without the threat of slaughtering dear friends. It is so, so hard to keep going sometimes. To allow myself to be taunted by the fragile caress of happiness only to fear it and cast both my terror and euphoria out into something that will never appreciate what gift it has just been given._

_But still, I know I am happy because so often it is the butterfly-kiss of a smile that I am casting out rather than would-be tears. I believe if I could ask for one thing to be lifted from me, I would not ask to be able to express my feelings. It's strange, because so often I long to be able to simply smile or hug or cry. Or maybe even scream. But I've grown used to abandoning my feelings and I can go on. I don't need to be able to show what's in me to know that I've got something… something more than an empty corpse of a soul._

_If I could have just one thing lifted from my shoulders… I think I should like to be able to wake up and know I would never need to meditate again. Oh God, I would love that so much. It's the hardest thing…really, it is. I would be alright to just let myself go if only there was a dimension I could escape to where the only life that would be ended was mine. I don't matter that much. I only meditate because it saves you. Maybe you don't realize that I keep my 'powers' in check only to keep you and the other titans safe. _

_I might be doing it for this city too, but I'm not sure. All I know is that I do it for you. It's so ironic to hear you and the others comment on how… peaceful I appear when I meditate. Yes, I do hear you. I hear all of you. All the time. You think I'm peaceful. You think meditation makes me serene. Maybe it does, but I don't really think about it. I don't think anything after I meditate. Not for a while. Not until the fire consuming me from the inside out and my heart begins to beat again do I actually think. _

_Half the time you say I'm meditating… I'm not. My meditation is very short. It only takes a small while to fold in on myself and retreat to the reality that is my mind. It only takes a little while to summon Trigon and allow him to do as he wishes with me. I let him because it keeps him quiet. It keeps him satisfied enough to remain sedated in the back of my mind and remain there. He is a demon, and his pleasure is my suffering. He tortures me… burns me, binds me. He wants only to see his daughter suffer… and then to see the world suffer. _

_The cycle was completed once. We thought it was the end of the world. You met my sire. And we 'defeated' him. So now he is within me again and his daughter is not done suffering. Until I am finished and can take no more, he will leave the earth alone. And that is why I meditate. For there is a dual effect. He is calmed for a time and I am numbed. Numbed until I cease to think or move blood through my veins. Inevitably, it allows me to cease to feel. And then I stop meditating. I split back through myself and return to normal consciousness. I wait until the knives stop driving themselves through my skull and limbs stop burning and burning and burning. I wait until my heart starts again and I can 'function.' Then I stop 'meditating' and go on without feeling a thing for a little while. And still none of you realize that I stopped my meditation hours before my eyes reopened._

_I'm still waiting for you to figure out that my mantra… my 'incantation' is the best form of screaming I have. It is the only screaming I have and by far, it is the only crying I have. _

_You know, I really wish I could tell you all of this. I wish this could tumble as easily from my lips as it does from my mind. I wish I could tell you how strangely broken and joyful I am. I wish I could give you happy tears. A mix of sorrow and pain and dancing and bliss._

_I wish I could make you understand all that. But I can't… because it would make me acknowledge what I feel and wish to express. And if that happened with… love… I know I wouldn't be able to give it away to something that would never even 'know' what it had received._

I blink, refocusing my eyes and look down at the table. The last slice of pizza is gone and everyone is speaking contentedly. Cyborg has pizza sauce on his chin. He is still watching me. I frown slightly and push back a strand of indigo hair. Then I tug up my hood and meet his gaze, cradled protectively within the shadow of my cloak. "Why are you staring at me, Beast Boy?" I drone. Monotone. I already know why he is watching me but I ask anyways. It's nice to pretend I don't. It's nice to deny certain truths. Especially ones that make me _feel._ Beast Boy's emerald cheeks flush slightly.

"Er… sorry, Raven. You just looked a little d-distant is all. Like you were thinking about something important," he simpers and scratches the back of his neck. I let a very soft sigh escape me.

"Mmm… well, it wasn't anything important… So you can stop staring now." I reply. He coughs and looks away, hurriedly jumping into the conversation being volleyed between Robin and Cyborg.

_It wasn't anything important… it was just everything I wanted to say to you. It was just everything I wish I could feel for you, Garfield._

And I close my eyes, take a deep breath and decide that perhaps I should meditate.

* * *

Author's Note:Bashes head on desk: I'm sooo sorry I didn't post last week and that this is so short! But honestly, I was trying to make this good. I was given a "hopeful,"so to speak, that there would be a fic in the Ravensection that was more a Raven introspective fic and not something purely relationship-ish. I thought it over and figured it'd be a good chance to express some of my views on the exact essences of Raven's powers and what she's really doing when she meditates... etc. As you can see, I still had to have a little bbxrae-fulness so there ya go. Perception... the product of two weekends worth of deleting and rewriting. I think I'm pretty much satisfied with the way it came out but it's rather short. It's one of those fics I'm not disgusted with but I'm not sure about. Kind of wierd, but whatever works... I guess. I _will try_to post this coming weekend but it may be another two-week deal. Still, the next one I'm thinking will be a bbxrae humor-type thing. Weeelll that's about all I needed to say except for: OMG DID YOU SEE THE RXS AWESOMENESS IN SNOWBLIND AND FOR REAL! not as good as Stranded but YAY! oh, and... pertaining to recent events I just want to remind everyone that flaming is mean... even if it is a flame for a silly rxr shipper. lol. But, seriously, author's hate it when you bash something and refuse to provide CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. On that note,constructively criticize me away!

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran


	12. Part 5: Raven: It's Not a Pimple and

**Part 5: Raven It's Not a Pimple and You Can't Flirt**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

BBxRae: Originally part of myupcoming story "Love Me Senseless" I decided this argument deserved its own story. Therefore, I give thee a bad-at-flirting Beast Boy and a somewhat humored, somewhat irritated Raven. And a chakra.In a nutshell:It's Not a Pimple and You Can't Flirt

* * *

I am taking deep, calming breaths.

I am meditating.

I am keeping my sanity.

I am holding my demon in check.

I am blocking out all sound.

I am… dealing with Beast Boy…

"And, Dude… sorry, Dudette, I was totally kicking their sorry little pixilated butts. I mean, can _anyone_ rock as hard as I do at MMORPG total domination? Cy is about as close as it gets to my prowess but that rusty milk pail is nothing when it comes to true, gamming talent, you know? Heh, if I could get just one dollar for every ounce of mad gamming skill I've got I could be as rich as that Bruce Wayne chum from Gotham. You know, everyone thinks he's so cool 'cause he's got all that money and stuff but he's not all that special. Seriously, I could have just as many ladies swooning over me if I had that much cash in my back pocket.

"Heh, it's not like he's the most badass thing from Gotham anyways. Come on; think about it Rae… does Bruce Wayne even _compare_ to Batman? Robin's one lucky seagull… er, don't ask why he's a seagull… but still. He got trained by like… the ultimate vigilante! I bet Rob's got the potential to be a really good MMORPG king… nothing close to me, of course, but if we could pull him away from his love-making with the punching bag I bet he could really kick butt.

"'Cause he does alright when you steal his bo-staff and shove a game station controller in his hand instead. But like I said… I still rule all. Hehe… Hey Rae, you ever played game station? I bet you could be pretty good too. I could give you some help, ya know… teach ya the basics… oh! Look! There's a fly on Cyborg's sandwich. Gee, I feel bad for the little guy. He probably doesn't even know what he's standing on. Wretched fly! Know ye not what lies beneath the surface of rye! Hehe. Gawd, how can that tin can eat slaughtered animals like that? It's got to be blasphemy or something. Hey, did I use that word right? Blasphemy… hrm… I think I heard some televangelist use it the other day…" and he just keeps going and going and going…

I look forlornly at the disregarded copy of _The Agony and the Ecstasy_ lying on my lap. I had actually intended on reading that…

I mutter a soft oath under my breath. He doesn't hear and I don't expect him to. He is still rambling on. Dear Lord, please fix the cable… now… I ponder for a moment why it should be I that was cursed to have entered the Main Room just as the cable went out and our resident animorph declared himself bored. If this is some form of judgment, I repent with all my heart. Perhaps he cannot see that beneath the shadow of my hood I am trying desperately to tune him out. Finally, I grit my teeth. I can't take any more. An artery pulses in my forehead and I jerk my hood down to give him a more effective glare.

"Beast Boy, may I _please_ entreat you to leave me alone! I just want to read… quietly… without distraction… Beast Boy, are you listening to me?" I growl. He is not. Rather, he is staring rather intently at my forehead. I blink rapidly and frown, crossing my eyes in an attempt to look up and see what has caught his attention so abruptly. "Beast Boy?" I say again, unsure. He shakes his head and leans forward a little, squinting at my forehead very fixedly. And then I realize: My chakra. I press my lips into an irritated line.

"Beast Boy, why, pray tell, are you staring at my chakra?" I ask. He is like some wild animal drawn to a sparkly object. It bothers me… greatly… "_Beast Boy,_" I emphasize. He finally snaps back to reality and pulls away from my face and his thorough studying of the gemstone on my forehead. A goofy grin spreads across his face. I narrow my indigo eyes. Thickly applied, black eyeliner outlining two irate, violet slits.

"Er, sorry Rae-Rae… I just noticed your little red forehead thingy looks like a really shiny pimple." He slurs. I am appalled by the comment. "

"Wha-? Beast Boy, it's a _chakra_ and it does _not_ look like a pimple. And DON'T call me Rae-Rae. Don't call me Rae, for that matter." I snap. My gaze simmers a turbulent grey. He chuckles.

"Well now, don't be getting your pink panties in a bunch…" he grins boyishly. I am horrified that he would even imply…

"Pink panties, Beast Boy? Don't even go there…" I snarl. _The Agony and the Ecstasy_ has been forgotten for the moment.

"Right, right. I'm sorry oh great Ice Princess… you only where pink panties on specific days on which you don't think they clash with your shiny zit." He cackles. I stand up in all my petite glory, seething. Without cable TV, he must be going through some deranged form of withdrawal because he is being very bold… testing my nerves…

"I don't wear… pink underwear… and it's a CHAKRA," I mutter. I must not give in to my urge to close Beast Boy in the toilet and send him on a spin cycle of doom. I try to regain composure and return to a nice monotone. But he has already gotten me irritated with his endless chatter. And now he targets my chakra as his next victim. Will he talk it off of my forehead? Or will he talk me to death first? Beast Boy bows low. I stare warily.

"Ah yes, of course… A _chakra_ is what it is… but a pimple I see! A lovely, shining pimple… from the gods! They send their heavenly zit to grace your forehead! You and you great Care Bare nightgown presence has been kissed by Aries… or was the goddess of love Aphrodite… no matter… you have been kissed by a wondrous and awe-inspiring zit of shininess!" He chortles. I cross my arms vehemently. I will keep control… I will keep control… I will keep control…

"Hehe, what's the matter Raven, flustered? Did I fluster you? Haha! I flustered you… didn't I?" he is leering with a pathetically smug grin that looks like a massive crescent-moon on his impish face. I flex my fingers slowly. Even breaths slither in and out of my tightly pressed lips. And then I nod slowly.

"_Oh yes, Beast Boy… you have sooo flustered me…_" I drone sarcastically. And then…

FLLAAASH—ZAAP! A wave of telekinetic energy leaps from the floor and knocks the elfish energizer bunny over.

"Daah!" he rubs his head, scowling, and stands to his feet. He wrinkles his nose and I can't help myself. I smirk, subtly. He takes note and rolls his eyes. "Right, now you smile. Jeez…" he huffs. I shrug.

"Was I supposed to smile when you called my chakra a _pimple_?" I ask. He blinks, pondering. I wait, and then he comes to a conclusion.

"Erm, yes?" he offers. I snort. Not very lady-like, but I really could care less.

Beast Boy sighs. "Um… right… s-sorry, if that, um… actually bothered you. I was just bored and you weren't paying attention and so I figured…" he babbles. I stare at him, dead-pan. I bend over and daintily pluck my fallen book from the floor.

"Mhm. Well, you did succeed in getting my attention," I sigh. I begin to walk towards the sliding doors that will lead me out of the main room and hopefully to a place of more solitude. "The cable should be back up now, you know." I drone.

Beast Boy stares after me and then tilts his head to the side, childishly. "I know." He replies. I stop at that, frown, and turn back to face him.

"Then _why_ did you insist upon continuing to pester me?" I inquire, vaguely irritated again. He blushes slightly, and I am rather surprised. He is… embarrassed… well… there's a new one.

"Erm, I didn't really intend for it to be pestering… at first…" he admits. I shrug.

"Whatever. You're free to go back to rotting your brains out in front of that oversized screen now," I comment. He blinks rapidly and then nods.

"Yup, guess so." He stands, awkward for a moment, and then retreats to a comfortable seat on the couch. He picks up the remote and begins to flip through channels. The cable has indeed been fixed. I stare at him for a little while. He scratches his tummy, disturbing the fabric of his baggy white undershirt. Beast Boy seems to have given up his uniform today, content to be a mindless couch potato in a pair of sweat pants and a T-shirt.

Finally, I mutter a soft curse to myself, roll my eyes and amble up behind him. I prop my elbows up on the back of the couch and then lean over his shoulder. He is startled and looks over at me. I look him steadily in the eye.

"Next time you try to flirt with a girl that doesn't do emotion… try asking her to a café… or something…" I drone. And then I very lightly, daintily, girlishly brush my lips over his. I pull back and retreat as abruptly as I had begun my endeavor, holding _The Agony and The Ecstasy_ loosely between my thumb and pointer finger.

As I disappear through the sliding doors to find silence at last, Beast Boy looks like a Christmas decoration. His cheeks are fiery red in contrast to his emerald skin. I kissed him… well… there's a new one.

* * *

Author's Note: Ok, I understand there are probably some grammatical errors and things in this and I'm sorry I didn't go through for a second edit. But I wanted to post this tonight... so yeah. 1/2 hour until the premiere of Kole. Fun! Um, anyhow... I had fun writing this one, I'm not sure if it qualifies as "funny" but I just wanted something a bit lighthearted after Blue Tears and Perception. So... here ya go. Raven's shiny zit ahoy. Jeez, I must be really pathetic to come up with things like this as plot lines. But you have to admit, a Beast Boy attempting to be flirty in his own little way is cute, whether or not the concept worked in this story . :Huggles BB: Now off to section 6! Forward March!

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran

ps- anyone want a brownie:offers brownies, grinning like an idiot: I love chocolate...


	13. Part 6: Cyborg: Dream Spell

**Part 6: Cyborg Dream Spell**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

CyxJinx Cyborg can't dream, so he's realized, and it kind of bothers him. But all those thoughts leave when he gets a visit from the girl he would've been dreaming of if he could. Some things are better than the sweetest dreams in the world.

* * *

23:09 on October 12, 2005. It comes in a stream of endless ones and zeros, leaping between cybernetics and a human mind, twisting from code to thought in an instant.

A lot of people think it's really fascinating… that something like me can still be human. Or mostly human. Or at least human at heart. It's really strange then, to realize that I've come to take my existence for granted. I'd like to think that I'm still harboring a human soul and that I'm not just under some strange illusion provided by a digitized brain.

I'd like to think that my human half is still the part that does all the living, not the robot part. But then I get these reminders, once in a while, that scream at me like sirens. Laughing and jeering at everything I've lost…

-----

"Urg, come on man… just admit defeat. I'm ready to hit the sack and I really don't feel like another round." I sighed and tossed down my game-station controller, staring lethargically over at the wide-eyed changeling occupying the seat beside me. I yawned as Beast Boy began to protest.

"B-but dude! That's not fair! If I win this next round I'll totally be able to say I kicked your butt! C'mon ya rust bucket, you don't need sleep! Who needs sleep! Sleep is overrated!" he chattered with emphatic flinging of his arms as accompaniment. I blinked dully and rolled my one human eye.

"How much caffeine did you have?" I asked, frowning slightly. Or was he always this hyper? It was kind of hard to remember at the moment. I was beat and I just wanted to go hook up for the evening and get a nice… long… quiet… recharging.

"Cy! C'MON! Please! Just one morrre!" he whined, clinging madly to his controller. I snorted.

"Have you even _looked_ at the score? I've got ya beaten five games to one. Even If you win the next round you can't beat me. You're being delusional, dawg," I pointed out. He pouted, looking ready to throw a tantrum. Yep, that's Beast Boy… can never take a loss like a civilized elf wanna-be. …He's still my best bro, though.

"Cy, you're so… so… just… grrr. I could totally whoop you. If we just played one more round, of course," he gazed longingly at the TV screen. I wasn't usually one to turn down another chance at kicking BB's butt but I was friggin' _tired_, half-robot or not. So I did the reasonable thing. I stood up and grabbed my controller, chucked it at this head and wandered out of the main room.

"Knock yourself out, little-man," I called over my shoulder. I couldn't help but smirk a little. And then Beast Boy plowed me down with one of the convenient little reminders…

"Yeah, yeah ya spoil-sport. _Sweet dreams to you too, buddy,_" he snapped sarcastically. I paused in the doorway, thinking for a moment. Dreams…

It hadn't really occurred to me that I didn't dream. I guess it's just one of those things I lost when over half of me got replaced by titanium and circuitry. I don't know. I just know I don't dream anymore. I guess I could program myself to have "dreams" but… it's not quite the same, when I think about it. So it was sort of novel to me, as I stood there, to realize that I really couldn't dream anymore. And it bothered me. I frowned. Had I lost other things and was unaware? Dreaming was never a very important thing, but to realize I was incapable of it was, in a way, unsettling.

I sighed and rubbed the back of my neck. "Yeah, sweet dreams for me…" I muttered. And then I wandered off to my room. As I entered my simple haven, my mind was wandering. The zeroes and ones were flying madly into thought as I rolled over and over my discovery in my head.

Why was it that I was perfectly happy and content when ignorant to my lack of dreams, but now that the thought had been slipped into my mind it festered and gnawed away at my restfulness? I furrowed my brow and stared down at the floor, observing my titanium feet as they shuffled me over to my "bed." It was really nothing more than a large steel slab… but it sufficed. It wasn't like I was aware of anything when I was recharging.

Perhaps I was more unsettled by my unwanted finding than I had thought, because I was still viciously pondering when I lay down on my 'bed' and failed to notice the petite figure standing in the corner of my room. I sighed. I was overreacting.

I had lived for a long time now, without dreams, and yet a simple… off-hand comment by _Beast Boy_ of all people had me upset. Or at least a little unhappy…

My mental running in circles was cut off by a soft chuckle weaving its way to my ears from that unnoticed being occupying the shadows of my room. My red eye pulsed as I sat forward, glaring out. Who…? What the hell?

"You're preoccupied tonight, Cyborg…" a feminine voice. I felt something in me jump with confusion. What was she… was it even her? "You're so different when you're a Titan. And yet you're the same. A paradox. That intrigues me. But please, what's got you preoccupied tonight?" her voice was low and mellow. Just as it had been ingrained into my memories for those brief weeks in which my feelings, my human feelings, were not taboo.

"Erm… this is a dream… isn't it… You're not really in my room…" it was rather ironic. More laughter. And she stepped into the light. Gothic-pretty attire and swept up rose hair. Brilliant fuchsia, feline eyes and pale but blushing skin. Slender… over-all petite with a look suited to the villainous vixen she was. Jinx smirked slightly.

"Cyborg… have you already forgotten that you can't dream?" she asked… purred… Her little gold coin, hung from a velvet blue ribbon about her delicate throat, glittered beneath the fluorescent light that was mounted singularly in the center of my room. I was blinking my one normal eye rapidly, trying to understand what the impish sorceress was doing in Titans' Tower of all places.

"…_Jinx?_" I finally cackled forth. She rolled her luminous pink optics.

"Nuh-uh, I'm Mammoth," she slurred sarcastically. I stood and moved over to her, frowning slightly but unable to hide the fact I was pleased to see her again. "Jinx, what in the world are you doing here? Don't you know how dangerous this is for you? Girl… if Robin sees you…" I shook my head furiously at the notion. "Besides… don't you hate me? Don't I hate you?" I asked stupidly.

Jinx exhaled a peel of laughter and she cocked her head to the side. "I don't know, Cyborg. I really don't know. You and the titans have been busy as of late. I have had a lot of time to think about what you did to me. It was really horrible of you… to take advantage of a lady like you did," she murmured, staring intently at me.

I frowned. "I was under cover, Jinx. It's not like I _intended _to start anything between us. We're from very, very different worlds…" I huffed and folded my arms, towering over the pretty pink witch.

"Mhm… of course. But still, you took advantage of me and you did start something. I think it's quite interesting, actually. I can't help but be impressed…" she examined her nails critically for a moment. She was really quite lucky that I still had a soft spot for her. If I had been in a completely right set of mind at the time, Jinx would probably be behind bars now.

"…Impressed? Why the heck would you be impressed by my tricking you like that? It wasn't really to your benefit, if I recall." I countered, confused by her skewed analysis of the past events.

"You must remember… we're from very, very different worlds," she mimicked my words. I shook my head. I guess for a villain… whatever. Different people are attracted by different things… "Now I know you're really a very noble person and all that jazz, but you managed to pull the wool over my eyes for a time. And that's unusual. I find it intriguing, and yes, Cyborg… I am still… _infatuated_, if you will. Assuming you weren't twisting your personality too much when you were _Stone_." She narrowed her predatory eyes.

"…Jinx… this is beyond wrong." I said, bluntly. At that, she gave me a wide grin. A crescent moon smiling on her face. Ah, right… 'wrong' was this little fate-bender's profession. How could I forget?

Jinx curtsied, knowing I understood. I sighed. It wasn't like I was going to deny the fact that the "infatuation" was still mutual. Despite the fact she would guiltlessly try to kill my friends and I on any given day, she was really a very likable being. She had… spunk. I think she must have put some sort of virus in my systems, because any way I looked at our relationship… was illogical.

I rubbed the back of my neck. Well…

Defeated, I opened my arms with a soft sigh. Her devilish look softened to something much more sweetly feminine and she lithely danced herself into my arms. Perhaps the titans were unaware that Jinx and I had actually dipped out toes into the idea of a deeper relationship sometime during my stay at the HIVE.

As utterly contraband as the hug should have been, we were both quite pleased to be holding one another again, and we did so for a while. No words were said. Finally, she spoke. "Guess you already know I'm not too mad at ya anymore," she said. I squeezed her delicate waist a little tighter in response.

Somewhere along the line, Jinx and I picked up a soft murmur of conversation. It was wonderful to speak with my villainess again, for that was what she was. _My_ villainess. And that was plenty of an explanation for me. We must have talked for a long time, but I wasn't really keeping track. Evidently, she was, though. She told me she had to go. I understood. I wasn't going to let her meet her fate in jail purely because she came to see me.

Her time to face justice would come eventually, but not by my hand. I hoped. None the less, she parted from me to leave and stood on the tips of her toes to place a kiss on my cheek. I grinned. "G'night, Jinx," I murmured, almost reluctant to see her go after having been apart for so long. I had assumed our relationship had ended with the crumble of the HIVE. I had assumed wrong.

I slept soundly for the remainder of that night, recharged fully even in the short amount of time I had in 'bed.' When I woke that morning, I was startled for a moment. I smelled perfume. Jinx's perfume. It still lingered from last evening's talks. I grinned.

I guess I was unusually happy that morning at breakfast, because Beast Boy took notice. He lifted a green eyebrow. "Guess you dreamt well last night," he commented. I paused in my inhalation of scrambled eggs. I swallowed carefully and then flashed him a familiar looking crescent moon smile.

"Nope. I don't dream, Bud," I chuckled. Because I don't dream. And she did visit me. And I know it was real and that in a twisted way she's forgiven me. I also know that seeing her will be better than dreaming. I left the breakfast table and returned briefly to my room.

I inhaled the faint scent of her perfume again. My grin widened. My little sorceress was real and she was back.

My little dream spell.

* * *

Author's Note: Okay... dunno what to say about this one --' I found it easier to write than I would've thought but I'm not sure it makes total sense. oO Hopefully it does. Heh. Now for much more important news... only one more episode of TT until Revved Up and Go are shown on Cartoon Network! WOOT! Hehe... I really hope that TT gets to sign for another season... I REALLY, REALLY hope... Then again, I'd also like to see Robin in his apprentice uniform again . Either way, I hope this chapter was at least somewhat enjoyable. Your reviews are all greatly appreciated... we're only a few away from hitting 300! Hehe, thank you all for your support... next week should bring you a CyxBee fic so stay tuned, lol. Somehow I think I'm becoming a BeexAqualad fan, though. I'm also much more partial to this CyxJinx pairing too, for some reason. Hmmm...

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran

P.s.- me thinks I want pudding... :runs off to find instant chocolate pudding: mmm...


	14. Part 6: Cyborg: Pumpkin Pie

**Part 6: Cyborg Pumpkin Pie**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

Cyborg wakes up early one morning to the smell of Thanksgiving cooking going on downstairs. Sometimes the best way to charm three little super-kids is with a good piece of "Mama's" Pumpkin pie.

* * *

I wake up. It's early in the morning, and I smell something wonderful drifting up the stairs from the kitchen. I yawn, wide and loud, and stretch beneath the covers. I absently tug the bundle of wires attached to my chest from my metal frame and let them retract back into my recharging unit.

I drag from under the covers and sit so my bulky titanium legs are hanging over the edge of my bed. I look over to where she should have been. She's not there, but that's to be expected on an occasion such as today. I can't help but smile as I blink my one human eye blearily. Again, my attention is drawn to the scents blossoming up from the lower level of my home and assaulting my nostrils like a heavenly plague.

I glance at the time. The other Titans should be arriving from their respective homes around noon. It's only six in the morning, but she's been cooking since yesterday afternoon. Running a metallic hand over my face, I shake my head. She's such a perfectionist. Suddenly, I stiffen. I can hear the patter of light feet rampaging down the hall, and I'm pretty sure there are impish giggles accompanying this rain of childish sound.

I roll my eye. Okay… I got it… Daddy time… I quickly stuff myself back under the covers and shut my eye. I listen as the door creaks open and a peel of laughter struggles out, followed swiftly by a 'covertly' hissed "shhh!"

There's a very slight disturbance on her unoccupied side of the bed and then:

WHUMP! "DADDY!" three, yes three, shrill voices shriek gleefully at once as I'm suddenly being 'strangled.' I open my eyes and pretend to be shocked, staring widely into two pairs of big, almond eyes. A third little face comes into view as my littlest crawls up on top of me and sits cross-legged on the covers.

"Hey, Squirts, what are y'all doing up so early?" I demand, grinning. The youngest rolls her grey eyes. She's the only one that seems to have taken after me in that respect.

"Daddy… it's _Thanksgiving_ for goodness sakes! Can't ya smell what Mama's making down in the kitchen?" she breathes, an air of excitement finally working its way into her five-year-old frame. She wiggles giddily. The twins nod furious agreements, their rich brown eyes staring pointedly into my own gaze.

I laugh slightly and make move to sit up. They let me and I open my arms to wrap my three kids in a bear hug. Giggling shrilly, they comply and hug me back. There's something incredible about holding your kids in your arms, the love you have for each of them is so indescribable. I sighed, content. "Well, I guess Thanksgiving just explains everything, doesn't it? Heh. Morning, guys." I say finally.

My boys, each seven, blink at me. "Pumpkin Pie," they declare. I arch an eyebrow. Sometimes, kids at this age are a little hard to figure out. I'm still in awe at how she seems to know exactly what they want and need at all times.

"Pumpkin Pie?" I ask. "What… you like Mama's pumpkin pie?" I translate. They nod.

"Yeah. It's the best on earth…" Victor Jr. says. Josh shakes his head furiously.

"Nuh-uh, it's the best on earth _and_ Tama-Tama…Tamaran? Is that how you say it, Dad?" he asks me. I shrug.

"Sound right, but you'll have to ask Mrs. Grayson that when she comes over. I don't think they've got Pumpkin pie up there…" the kids look at me like I'm crazy. I put my hands up defensively. "What? The only pie I've seen her make has weird wiggly things coming out of it," I retort.

Immediately, three faces take on radical expressions. My youngest, Faith, looks appalled. The boys, on the other hand, are glowing with delight. Jr. looks ready to reconsider whether his mother's pie really is the best thing on earth and his little fists are actually flickering with electrical currents. All of my kids seem to have gotten their abilities from her. I can't help but smirk a little. Josh beams.

"That's so COOL!" he bubbles. Faith hisses in disagreement. Little wings on her back buzz to life as she lifts emphatically off the bed.

"No, it's yucky! Wiggly things are _not_ supposed to be on _pie_," she declares. Josh and Vic Jr. roll their eyes. I chuckle as the three begin to banter enthusiastically. It's not too hard to slide out of bed fully and watch as Vic Jr. waves his sparking hands wildly while he speaks and Josh shrinks and grows in attempts to avoid the stray bolts of electricity that are coming off Vic's little hands.

Faith is hovering on her little gossamer-like wings, her pigtails dancing from the stirred up air being blown around her figure. She looks more and more like her Mama every day. "Kids, calm down. We don't wanna distract your mom from her cooking. You know how she gets, trying to prepare a huge feast for all my old titan-friends…" I say.

All of us share a knowing look. My wife is a stickler when it comes to being a good hostess. Faith blinks her stormy eyes cutely. "Mama always makes the best Thanksgiving meals…" she comments. Josh wrinkles his nose dryly.

"Duh… as if we didn't know that, Faith," he snorts. I frown slightly at the boy.

I'm about to scold him, but Faith gets to it first. "Hey… don't be mean!" she hisses, and then promptly tackles Josh to the floor. I go bug-eyed and try to intervene. Vic Jr. stares at his two siblings for a minute before beaming and jumping into the fray. I inwardly slap myself.

"Josh, Faith, Vic, BREAK IT UP!" I bellow. They do no such thing. I try to grab them and pull them apart but I have only two hands. One of them is always able to evade me. I grit my teeth, mentally going over again the reasons why I had wanted to be a father. These kids are so lucky I love 'em, because they'd be pinned to the wall by their pajamas by now if I didn't.

For the next ten minutes I'm scrambling to get them to behave, but with Josh shrinking and bounding away from my grasp and Faith flitting out of reach and Jr. inadvertently shocking me every time I touch him… I'm getting nothing accomplished.

I believe there are miracles. Because, just when I think I'm ready to grow myself a grey hair with three super-powered ankle-bitters scrambling around me to swing punches at one another… they all just stop. Dead in their tracks, they're staring intently at the doorway with saucer eyes and looks of sheer jubilance on their young faces.

I hear her voice behind me. "Need some help, Sparky?" my wife purrs. I simper and turn to faces her. Bumblebee stands with two little plates of pumpkin pie balanced on either hand and a smug look on her pretty face.

"Hey, Hon…" I grin sheepishly. "Just trying to get the little ones under control…" I explain. The 'little ones' in question are still staring hungrily at the heavenly pies their Mama is holding. Finally, Faith gets the nerve to ask the question printed plainly across all three faces.

"That's for us, isn't it, Mama?" she says. Bumblebee looks down at her daughter. They simply stare at one another for a little while, and then my wife grins and nods. Josh and Jr. share a high-five and then eagerly reach for their plates. They are rewarded, as is Faith. There's still one plate remaining.

I eye it curiously, fairly sure it's for me. Bumblebee saunters over to me and smiles softly. "…pie?" I say finally. Bee rolls her eyes and produces a final fork. She hands it to me and then allows me to take the plate of pie as well.

"Happy Thanksgiving, Sparky…" she winks. I nod in reply, my mouth stuffed with intoxicatingly wonderful pie. Definitely the best on Earth… and Tamaran… or whatever.

"Happy Thanksgiving, Hon," I reply when I finish my bite. I kiss my wife softly and smirk. Both of us have our eyes trained on the three little children seated on the floor, devouring their pumpkin pie. "We have a lot to be thankful for, eh?" I comment. She nods pleasantly.

"That we do…" she replies and then she hugs me and I hug her back (still holding my pie in one hand). She closes her eyes and smiles. "I love you, Victor," she murmurs. I would've said something like "I love you too, Karen," but my mouth was full again as I skillfully finished off my piece of pie over her shoulder.

* * *

Author's Note: Here ya go. In honor of Thanksgiving next week. I'm going on a very short hiatus, but I'll be back with another chapter in two weeks. I don't think I'll have time to write another chapter because I'm visiting my aunt and I'll be busy, but if I bring the laptop with me on the way down, I might be able to get a chapter done to post late Sunday night or something. But as of now, I'm going to call it a Thanksgiving hiatus and plan on coming back in two weeks... I'm hoping that I'll be able to at least tape Lightspeed and watch it when I get back. I hate missing new episodes. Especially when this is supposed to be the last season of Teen Titans. I hope CN changes their mind, I mean... there are still more than enough viewers out there who are big TT fans so... why stop? Heh, if they need more plots for their episodes, I'd be willing to give 'em a few ideas! ((holds up box full of ultra-fluffy rob/star and bb/rae fics))

I hope the fic wasn't too horribly short, but I just wanted to write something small and remotely Thanksgiving related and this is what I came up with. Thank you for getting me to 300 reviews! Your support is priceless!

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran

P.s.- I don't know... I still like CyxBee and CyxJinx and I think BeexAqualad could be kind of cute... but I think the AqualadxSpeedy pairing is pretty endearing in its own way . I'm only a really solid RobxStar shipper. I'm even ok with like... RaexCy or RaexOC if it's done right and BBxTerra is logical, but I'm not a fan. Heh. Now you know all of my pairing prefs. Congrats or something. lol.


	15. Part 7: Robin: Romancing Poison

**Part 7: Robin Romancing Poison**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

RxS. Robin doesn't like the fact that Star loves him. Not at all. He should be flattered, but he cares too much to let her get hurt. And loving him... well, he'll end up hurting... tainting her. She's romancing poison and he doesn't approve. But Starfire's quite sure she knows exactly what she's doing.

* * *

I don't know exactly when it all started. All I know is that it did. Somewhere along the line, she stopped looking at me as purely a leader. I wasn't just number one in command… I was a friend. I was alright with the arrangement, really. I might go as far as to say I was almost pleased. I think I found some rest in the realization that with her… I could be a little less of a hero and a little more of a person.

It was almost like I could bring my childhood back from the dead, if only for the few scant moments we found alone together. I became 'friends' with all of my teammates. And I thought it was fine.

But I guess, at some point… I couldn't give an exact moment… she decided to look past the mask. Or at least, she decided to try. I don't know what she found, if she found anything at all. None the less, she saw something that intrigued her… or perhaps entertained her. Sometimes it's hard to tell exactly what she's looking at and why. And she fell in love.

She fell in love with something broken and twisted and I was horrified. I see it now, whenever we're talking. Whether it be about our next mission or as… friends… I see her longing. I see her wanting to understand me and see her trying to reach out to me. But she's romancing poison, and I tend to be protective.

I can't let her hurt herself, and yet simply the fact she loves me is a suicide wish strapped down on her delicate frame. No one could know how dirty it makes me feel to know she loves me, and so right at the same time. She'll realize she needs to step down from her cloud of hope one day, I think. One of these days she'll gain some sense and stop this stupid love that's addled her head. The bad part is, it may take as much as ripping an angel down from heaven and clipping its wings to make her gain that sense… and I don't want to see those beautiful eyes bleed. I really don't.

Call it controlling, call it what you like, but I'm an obsessive person and I can't help the fact I want her to be safe. I want to hide her away and assure that nothing will ever hurt her and no one will ever touch her. I can't let her remain enamored with a being teetering between acid and venom.

She doesn't try to hide it. She doesn't try to hide her jealousy and she doesn't try to hide her affections. I wish she could at least pretend she doesn't love me like that. Just so I could sleep at night feeling that she's safe from me. It's really rather disturbing to think that I might become responsible for corrupting such an innocent being.

If I didn't care about her so much… if she wasn't my best friend… I might be able to go on with a clear conscience and even be flattered. But I _do_ care and she _is_ my best friend.

I sigh and run my fingers through my messy black hair. I wish I could give her back her heart, because honestly I don't like having to dance around things to keep it from shattering.

I lean back in my chair and glare at the computer screen. I wonder how long it'll take me before I can concentrate on entering these files and stop thinking about her soulful eyes and gentle smile. I've been thinking about her too long as it is, because I swear I can smell her right now. She always smells so sweet… and I can't stand the fact I like it so much…

"…Robin? You are still awake?" I hear her voice drift over to me curiously. I close my eyes and exhale slowly. Pasting a reassuring smile on my face, I turn to face her.

"Yeah, I've just got to finishing entering these last few files here and I'll be heading off to bed…" I say. I don't tell her that I won't be sleeping. I don't tell her that I'll go to bed and feel guilty for enjoying her presence for the rest of the evening. She is studying my face. Perhaps I look tired because she speaks again.

"I could finish entering them for you. You have done enough work as it is,"

"No, it's alright. I'm fine. It won't take too long, anyways," I turn back to the computer screen and begin to type, hoping she'll just let it be and go to bed herself.

"…"

"…" I can still smell her… My lips curve into a very slight scowl.

"You wish for me to leave." She says. It's not a question by any means. It's a soft statement, a little concerned and a little curious. She wants to know what she's done wrong. "I am sorry I interrupted you, Robin. Please forgive me," she apologizes and I hear her shuffle away from me. I am silent. I hear her stop.

I lift an eyebrow as I hear her begin to move back in my direction. She comes to stand at my side. She's looking at me…

"There's nothing to apologize for, Star. It's fine…" I try and assure her. She remains, obviously standing by me for a different reason that hearing me accept her apology or, in this case, wave it off. I look up at her from my seat.

Her long auburn hair falls like silk and two stubborn tendrils fall forward over her shoulders. Her big green eyes are staring into my masked gaze intently. "Yes, Starfire?" I ask. She bites her lower lip, considering her options. Finally, she leans over and hugs me.

"Goodnight, Robin. Please try and get some rest," she murmurs. I blink and then awkwardly hug her back. She's been doing that a lot recently. Hugging me… playing to close to a fire, I think.

"You too, Star. Goodnight," I say. She pulls away and I'm almost disappointed. That bothers me. Perhaps it is I that plays to close to fire…

"You are not upset with my interruption, then?" she asks. I shake my head. No… I'm not mad at her. I can't be mad at her. "That is good. I truly hate to have you upset with me. Well… I suppose I hate to have you upset at all," she smiles, fondly. One day I'm going to make her angel eyes bleed tears they don't deserve and I don't want to. I frown furiously at this. If she stopped being so… so… endearing and decided to be smart and give up on the human male population… maybe I wouldn't have to grind her heart into dust. But then, I'm under the impression I've done it several times already.

That's a problem. I hurt her a lot, and I know it. But then I feel bad and try to make it up to her in my own… less-graceful ways. Whether it be an intensely awkward verbal apology or just accepting her into my room for a little while so she can recover from a nightmare, I find something just so I can assure her I didn't _really_ mean to kick her to the curb… m-metaphorically, of course…

The issue with all of _that_ is the fact that in reality I _did_ mean to hurt her. I wanted her to stop glorifying me. But it never, ever works. I think, what I must be doing is something akin to slapping a band-aid onto someone's are and then ripping it off and sticking it back on repeatedly. I wonder if she really forgets the sting of all those times I disregarded her, or if she just ignores it.

By now, my face has become a very contorted and unhappy grimace. Starfire is watching me with those girlishly wide eyes, feminine and somewhat feline… all around exotic green… "Erm… I h-have upset you again?" she mews, curling her slender fingers into fists. She is determined to make amends for her non-existent offense.

"No… Star; just… go on to bed. You need your rest. I'll be fine." I purse my lips and exhale wearily. She gives me a sympathetic sort of look and reaches out, as if to touch my face, and then decides against it and drops her hand back to her side. She bows very slightly, like she might do on Tamaran for someone of higher status. I really want to roll my eyes, and I know she won't be able to see it, but I refrain because I've just been mulling over her fragile psyche and have no desire to chance butchering her aptitude for politeness.

"If you are sure… I shall go then. G-goodnight, Robin. Pleasant dreams," she offers. After another moment's hesitation she strides away from me. I wait until I believe she is out of the room.

"…Why are you here… doing this, Star? Can't you see you're just making this hard on both of us?" I mumble to the air, quietly. I set to typing again and find myself genuinely surprised when the 'air' replies to my inquiry. It seems the alien princess had not been _quite_ out of the room…

"It is not I making it harder on us, but you…" Starfire replies, sweetly. I blink rapidly and swivel my chair so I'm facing her, a rather disgruntled expression slapped neatly on my face. _Me? I'm not making it harder… it's all you._

"…what?" I say finally. She shrugs, not really looking at me. She's pensive. I can see it in the way she chews thoughtfully on her lower lip and hugs herself with one arm.

"You are the one making things harder on us," she repeats. I'm not pleased with this comment.

"Mind _explaining_?" I grunt. I don't believe we've actually had a conversation centered on her feelings about me… or vice versa.

"Well… I… believe you are hiding," she says slowly, perhaps a little cautiously.

"_Hiding_?" I echo. She nods.

"But truly, it is fine. You need not _loose sleep_ over it. I really _am_ quite capable of deciding whom I do and do not love… as well as realizing that there are faults in everyone. I hardly expect a perfect love, Robin. Just love in which both of us are trying our bests to be all that we can be." She says, simply… bluntly…

…She's a clever little thing… "But…" I try to say something, but find I really have nothing to input. What am I supposed to tell her? Sorry, I don't love you because I'm afraid I'll drag you down with me?

"Oh hush, Robin. I do not wish to hear your buts. I am perfectly content in how I feel. And… and you should be also," she floats back over to my side and swats my shoulder. I'm not about to tell her that it hurt… a little… Besides, I'm still registering the fact that _she_ shushed _me_.

"Are you implying something, Star?" I grumble, eyeing her irritably. Again… playing much to close to fire. She's dancing around with a knife in hand, is what she's doing. She needs to stop. She needs to go to bed and leave me alone. I don't want her to stay, because then I'll get to the point that I'll like it too much to let her leave. If that happens, I don't know that things will go well. Because it's not safe to take a dip in a lake of venom. It's just not right to let her romance poison.

"Implying? Hardly so, Robin. I am stating a fact and nothing more. Truly, why do _you_ think I am here?" she asks me. She's trying to get me to answer my own questions. I sigh, unhappy that I enjoy her company and unhappy that I'm probably her only downfall.

"Because you're a titan, Starfire. You're here to be everyone's angel," And that's as far as I'll let myself go with that train of thought. She sniffs, disagreeing with my reply.

"No, Robin…" her voice dips to a soft whisper. Gentle, almost coaxing… but infinitely innocent. "I am here and not on Tamaran, ruling my people, because you and the titans are my friends. And more importantly… _you_ need someone to love," she sighs. I look at her, unsettled by her reasoning. I need someone to love? Perhaps, but her? No. I couldn't be that selfish. I couldn't be so impossibly selfish that I'd risk hurting her just so that I might blissfully succumb to loving her…

… Right?

Or not. I guess I might really be just that selfish. I must be, because I sure as hell am not refusing the light kiss she's placed on my lips. In fact, I think I'm probably encouraging it by pulling her closer. But… I… I guess if she _wants_ something broken…

I guess if I make her happy… Maybe I can be content to add 'selfish' to my list of overly-protective and obsessive… without too much trouble. I'm not sure why I'm giving in, and letting her kiss me. I'm not sure why I'm kissing her back. I'm not sure why she feels so right in my arms or why I was so fortunate as to catch the eye of an angel.

And something in her kiss, her knowing… gentle… understanding touch… is making me think that letting her romance poison is alright. Because I think angels are immune to the taint of the world. I think if anything, she'll clean me before I can dirty her. And that's good. That's really good.

Because she's stayed much too long for me to let her go.

* * *

Author's Note: Well, here's the first of Robin's section. I hope you all had a good Thanksgiving! I guess I'm alright with how this truned out, but it's not quite how I would've liked it. Hopefully you all find it alright. I've just realized that as of November 14, I have officially been on for a year. It's quite exciting! And it deffinitely would not have been the same without all of you. Thank you so much for all of your support! I hope to be here for a long long time. Any comments would be appreciated, I love hearing from you all. Check out my profile soon for descriptions of my two possible upcoming fics along with Love Me Senseless ;)

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran

P.s.- Up to date...

I have posted a total of 261,587 words in 37 stories (36 of which are complete). Thanks to you all I've been added tothe favorites lists of 241 members and have recieved a collective 2,184 reviews (Assuming my calculator is right --'). You are all amazing, and again thank you for all of your wonderful support!


	16. A Note

Starfire walks onto a large empty stage and looks out at a non-existent audience, her eyes big. Her nervousness is obvious, and she shuffles her feet and tugs at a lock of her auburn hair. After a few moments of silence, she looks off stage with awkward desperation. It seems that someone has heard her silent plea for help… and it appears that this someone is none other than… The Boy Wonder!

Robin dramatically flaunts on stage, twirling his bo-staff and his cape billowing as he strides to the distraught alien princess. There is a pause and then he hands her a note. She peers at it and then nods sheepishly. Robin offers a suave wink and saunters back off stage.

Starfire clears her throat. "Ahem… It has been requested that I, Starfire of the Teen Titans and Princess of Tamaran report to you that… um…" she stares oddly at the stage, and one tiny eyebrow arches high on her forehead. "Raven?" She calls absently, still staring at the peculiar note. The summoned sorceress shuffles on stage, hood drawn up to hide her features.

"Yes, Starfire?" Raven replies in her flat, lifeless tone.

"This person… has my name?" she asks curiously. Raven glances at the paper and nods.

"Yes. The person whom has composed this note does indeed have your name. She is an author on and consequently is master over our every action in her fictions. She may bend us to her will and manipulate our emotions to suit her. In short, Starfire… she is a god over our cartoon existence." Raven hums.

Starfire blinks. "…Oh. Okay then…" she looks back at the paper. Raven seems satisfied with the response and teleports off the stage in a portal of obsidian power. "Right… well… anyhow… Princess Starfire of Tamaran… who is not me… but an author on this fiction of fans place… has requested that I report to you all that she is gravely sorry for her absence and neglect of last week's update. She wishes to inform you she will be back with a new chapter sometime mid-next week and another that weekend. She apologizes for her absence, but is very busy at the moment." Starfire takes a deep breath and continues.

"And that is all." She pauses, unsure about the abrupt ending. Finally, she curtsies. This is met with a wild round of applause from Cyborg and Beast Boy who have landed themselves in the front row somehow. She blushes. From off stage, Robin's hand appears and tosses a dozen roses. Starfire picks them up and cradles them Miss America style. "Th-Thank you…" she mumbles cutely. She curtsies again and then wanders off stage.

Raven reappears on the stage. "Well… you can stop reading this now… the author's note is over. Princess Starfire of Tamaran will be back in a few days, so please be patient."

Raven walks off stage without another word. And Beast Boy offers a random cat call. The curtain drops over the empty stage.


	17. Part 7: Robin: Angel With a Gun

**Part 7: Robin Angel With a Gun**

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans

Robin remembers his meeting with Starfire and contemplates the changes in her personality. When the princess joins him, she draws his attention to a certain other aspect of their meeting... and refreshes his memory._ RxS

* * *

Her eyes blazed like brilliant orbs of seething fury… mini suns of emerald fire. She glared at me, hands outstretched with power dancing madly off of her slender fingertips. She pressed her lips into a thin, angry line and I… produced a small tool. I saw something flicker across her face. Perhaps it was fear of this terran device, perhaps it was confusion. Either way, she didn't fire. She remained still and I gingerly unshackled her thin wrists. She exhaled and dropped her hands towards her sides, eyes locked with mine, even behind my mask._

_She had found me with a single glance. She had pierced my soul with one awed meeting of gazes. And she didn't know._

_She looked down at her freed wrists. She looked back at me. A freed slave contemplating her first act as a respectable warrior again. As a princess again. But I wouldn't find out of her royalty for the next two years. Still, seconds hung in the air and dripped through time like raindrops slipping slowly down a windowpane. It couldn't have been more than a minute but it felt like her contemplation was taking an eternity._

_Her hand rose and moved to the back of my neck; for these brief moments she was no longer hostile. She drew me to her and, before I could consent, her lips were pressed firmly over mine. A kiss… but one which held only determination rather than love… or even lust. I didn't know her intentions. I didn't know much anything but her taste and the fact that I was savoring the contact and struggling to pull away at the same time._

_She released me, about the time I had stopped fighting her, and I gasped for breath and shot her an irritable glance. Who did she suppose she was? To attack me and then turn just as quickly to kiss me… what was going on in that alien mind?_

_I had known her for less than a day and she had already twisted my emotions into highly uncomfortable knots that I wanted desperately to untangle. I wanted to be mad. I wanted to hit her over the head with my bo-staff and stalk away with the harshness I had learned to carry from my mentor._

_But then… she spoke. She spoke in our language. Perfectly clear. And her voice was the sound that would haunt my dreams for many, many nights to come. She entreated us to aid her… and we did. I can't remember if I put up a fight at first or not. All I know is that somehow, we ended up aiding her and through it we were brought together as titans._

_And she stayed… and became one of us. She became our angel. The warrior was made pure again with a simple act of kindness… which she has repaid to me ten-fold…_

_She is a warrior._

_She is a titan._

_She is an angel._

_She is Princess Koriand'r. _

_She is Starfire._

I am lying on my back, staring up at the clouds. I think the others are playing football. I sigh, swallowing and pushing away the fanciful memory of her lips on my own. I think I've come to view our meeting in a much fonder light. I wish I had known how much she means to me now back then. Maybe I would've kissed her back… or something.

I screw my face into an unattractive grimace. I hear a giggle somewhere behind me. It's Star. I arch an eyebrow up over my mask and wait. I'll learn her intentions soon enough. It's crazy how much she's changed. It's as if all her bitterness just disappeared the moment she realized people still cared about her.

I think she needed to know she was still valuable. I think she needed to know that the part of her that was more than just a highly-effective, alien powerhouse was still worth something. She needed to know that her innocence wasn't a weakness.

Admittedly, I'm a little startled when she flops down behind me. She's propped herself on her elbows so she can rest on her stomach and peer over my face at the same time. Her auburn tresses fall like a ruby curtain on either side of her face and caress the grass. She's created a little sanctuary for the two of us. Only I can see her pretty smile and gentle eyes… admittedly upside-down from my current perspective, and I feel kind of special. Perhaps that's foolish, but I don't care.

I realize that she looks at peace. It's wonderful. I am again reminded of the change she's gone through. How delicately sweet she's become. I wonder if the other part of her… the ruthless fighting side… I wonder if it's ever hard for her to control. I wonder if she ever wants to scream rather than smile or destroy rather than aid.

I don't think so… but sometimes you never know. I guess even angels can carry guns…

"Is something the matter, Dick?" she murmurs, her voice dropping to a concerned tone. She seems to have noticed my wandering mind. I grin crookedly.

"Nothing's wrong, Kori, nothing at all." I assure her. She rolls her jade eyes and giggles, her breath fanning over my face.

"Perhaps you would lie a bit better if everything were alright…" she muses. I snort.

"Really, nothing is wrong. I'm just… thinking about stuff, you know?" I reply slowly. She nods slightly and then glances up, squinting at the sun for a moment. A tiny smile curls onto her face and suddenly she's gone. She has pulled away from me and I cannot see her with my view limited to straight up as I lie on my back in the grass. "Starfire?" I ask, wondering what has caught her attention.

She is standing at my feet now. I wonder how she's gotten there without my immediate notice. "Yes, Robin?" she hums in reply. I lift my head slightly to see her better.

"Nothing. I just wondered where you'd gone." I say. She shrugs… and then tackles me. For a few minutes I can't breath. She's plowed into me with… a lot of force.

Angel with a gun indeed.

She's sprawled lazily on top of me, perching her elbows on my chest so her hands can prop up her chin. She grins at me as I wheeze a few times.

Once oxygen is again flowing normally, I take the time to frown. "What was that for?" I ask. She blinks her wide eyes.

"What was what for?" she asks. I wonder if she can truly underestimate her alien strength that much… but I say nothing. If anything, she's toying with me. I don't particularly mind.

"You know you've changed a lot…" I say finally. She stares at me for a minute and then her gaze clouds.

"Have I truly?" she breaths. I consider the question.

"Well… it appears you have. Then again… I don't know. After we fought, that first time we met… you changed so quickly. It was like, all your anger disappeared. I think I've only seen that side of you once or twice since. That's what I was thinking of earlier. How I barely ever see that furious side of you anymore. The rest of the time you're just…" I trail off and reach to play with a piece of her hair. She doesn't resist. Rather, she seems to be turning over my words in her head. It's the truth. I haven't seen her truly become angry to the point that some of her old "warrior mind-set" seems to return.

That's not to say she isn't powerful. It's just… she balances the power with compassion and the strength with tenderness. She's noble, no doubt, but I almost never see the merciless fighter. I saw it once when I met her, again when she charged in to relieve me of my apprenticeship to Slade, and once more when she fought to rid her planet of her sister's tyranny.

"The rest of the time I am just…" she prompts me to finish my statement. I sigh.

"…precious…" I say finally. She blushes slightly.

"That is flattery I do not deserve." She mutters softly. Her eyes are sad. I shift on the grass a little. She is still draped over me.

"How can you say you don't deserve it?" I ask. She shrugs and then folds her arms so that they act like a pillow on top of my chest. She rests her head on them.

"I have not changed, Richard. I have simply… repressed what I was trained to be and released what I have always been. As a slave… I had walls to hold around myself. I did it for… self-preservation. Then… you released me and I was able to relax again. I only hope that by refraining from _certain_ less humane impulses I have proven myself honorable to you. So I am not precious. I am me. And I hold back certain things. That is all I can do," she says quietly. I stare at her. I'm silent… this girl… she's the embodiment of innocence and purity but even she has something within her that still longs to swell with power.

"What do you repress?" I say finally. I know, or at least partially know that answer.

"Anger. Fury… whatever you wish to call it. Like… I wanted to kill Slade so badly… when he hurt you. That was a long time ago, and yet sometimes I still think I could demolish this whole planet just so that I might know he is dead. That sort of thinking… that desire to kill without consideration… it was encouraged in slavery. I cannot change what has been seared into my mind. All I can do is hold back and hope I will never disappoint you or the others by abandoning my desire to be compassionate for my desire to watch our enemies burn," she says blankly. She stares at me carefully. "I suppose there are many others who feel the same way, though," she adds.

I nod as best I can and she smiles slightly. "Of course, as long as we are reminiscing on our first meeting… I thank you," she says suddenly, giggling softly. I arch an eyebrow in question.

"For what?" I reply. Star shrugs.

"For teaching me English…" she moves so her face is hovering over mine and her hair creates an intimate sanctuary around us again. I feel her breath fan softly over me and then her lips are caressing my own. It's like the day we first met all over again… only, I don't struggle and I _definitely_ kiss her back. I think she's laughing, but it's hard to tell with her lips still covering my own.

I believe, if anything… her kisses are her greatest weapon. "Any time, Kori. I _love_ teaching you things…" I slur as we part. I'm smirking, I know. She rolls her pretty eyes. I think we've forgotten our whim to contemplate seriously her old, forced life-style.

"Mmm… I see…" she kisses me again. I sigh contentedly. She tastes the same as the first day we met, only… there's pure, affectionate love over determination.

She's my gun toting angel, my starbolt-throwing princess… and I'll be damned if I don't love it.

* * *

Author's Note: Well, I finally got it out... and right after Go! with... the... KISS! Ok, so it was a flashback, WHO CARES! It was still a kiss AND I think we'll get a "romantic" kiss in the movie. The only sad part is that the last season of the titans is drawing to a close here in a couple of months. Now, I wrote this as a sort of follow-up to Go! even though I have yet to see the eppie and this is going off of screenshots I got. I'm going to watch Go! for the first time on Friday at 6:30 a.m... I swear, only an event like this could get me up that early on holiday. Either way, I'm psyched! I just have to keep looking at the picks to remind myself it was real. Lol. I hope the chapter was alright. I'll be heading on to the BB section next. WOOT! I think tomorrow I'm going to start my christmas mini-fic just so I can have it done by christmas day or the day after... or something. We'll have to see how it goes.

BTW: LIFE IS AWESOM! ROBIN AND STARFIRE KISSED AND I HAVE THE PUNK CHRISTMAS CD WITH FOB ON IT! YAY FOR THE HOLIDAYS!

Love,

Princess Starfire of Tamaran

((oh... and did y'all know that BB and Rae kissed in the comics? I saw the pics and was like OO))


	18. Part 8: Beast Boy: Mopeds and Deamons

**Part 8: Beast Boy Mopeds and Demons**

Disclaimer: I do not own the teen titans

BBxRae. Beast Boy writes a letter in hopes of getting a moped... and ends up writing about his favorite empath instead. A little ficcy delving into the two loves of out favorite changeling...

* * *

_Me, I'm an outgoing kind of guy. I'm funny… easy to get along with… and if ya have a random desire to hang out with a green penguin or something like that, I can do that too. Yep… I'm a real good dude… and I think it's about time I get something I really want. Like a moped._

_I mean, really. Let's be reasonable! What isn't there to love about a moped? Sleek, shiny frame… bright light… goes vroom… everything a man could want. I think I could honestly say I'd be content if I could just have a moped…_

_Heh, Raven's lookin' at me funny now. I think it's because I'm writing. She thinks I'm illiterate or something. Just because I don't do well with all her dreary mumbo-jumbo, she thinks I'm illiterate! Hah! I'll have you know that I once read an entire Dr. Seuss book once… backwards and upside-down, too! I'm not illiterate. Either way, she's looking at me funny and probably thinking that I must be up to something. I mean, I am… sort of… because… ya know… this letter is kinda sorta for you, Robin… to convince you to buy me a moped._

_Because you're rich. Don't try and deny it, buddy. I've seen how many R-cycles you've wrecked… and they just keep on showing up nice and shiny and new whenever you need 'em. It takes money to do that, and I know it. So don't try and deny the fact that you could totally get me a moped._

_I'd be a really good driver too. I have totally wicked reflexes and… stuff. Oh, and I'd pay real good attention to the road. Nothing would distract me, I swear!_

_…Raven's still staring at me and it's kind of weird…_

_You know, she looks kind of cute when she's suspicious. Which is like, all the time. Around me, at least. You know what's really stupid, though? Just because I'm easy-going she thinks I'm an idiot. Granted, I don't use my noggin on a regular basis but that doesn't mean I don't have one. And just because I can laugh once in a while she thinks I'm shallower than a puddle in hell. Yet she's still… really cute when she's all Goth-ish. Which… is pretty much all the time. Right._

_…I got distracted, didn't I… Darn this pen. If this was pencil, I'd so erase the last part of the letter but it's not and I don't want it to be all messed up and scribbled on. Anyways, back to the moped. I really think you should get me one. Because, we're tight and all. We're buddies! _

_Plus, you're like… the leader of the titans and stuff, so it'd show how great you were and how lucky we are if you'd buy me that moped. Think about how cool I'd make the titans look, anyways._

_I know I'm already our best-looking dude and all, but just imagine me on a moped cruising down the street… letting our citizens know they were safe from harm. It'd be awesome. With the wind blowing through my hair and Raven on the back waving at people as we passed… well, maybe she wouldn't wave…_

_…ok, maybe she wouldn't ride at all…_

_…I wonder why not. She'd look good on the back of a moped. Raven needs to lighten up a little. She's a really cool person to be around, she just doesn't notice it. If she just tried being a little more friendly, she'd have people paying to hang out with her. She's not staring at me anymore, but she's still in the room. I like being around her. Even when she's trying to send half of me into one dimension and half of me into another._

_I wish she knew that people really do like her. I wish she knew that I would even give up getting a moped to see her happy more often._

_I think… maybe you should buy Raven a moped. Mopeds make people happy, and it's really nice to see Raven happy. I don't know if she'd like one, but if it made her happy then it'd be worth loosing every moped in the universe to her. Robin, I'm distracted again… I know… but I can't help it._

_Raven's an amazing person and she means a lot to me. I don't think I'll ever end up giving you this letter, but I just need to write it down. I may not be the brightest thing in the world, but I know I love mopeds a lot…_

_… and I also know that know matter what Raven thinks I may believe about her and no matter how shallow or stupid she might think I am…_

_…I love Raven more than mopeds._

_Sincerely,_

_Beast Boy_

I slap my pen down on the coffee table and wad up my letter. Raven looks up from where she's begun to read and lifts an eyebrow. I simper and throw it away under her critical gaze. I grin slightly at her as I prepare to leave.

"…What?" she drones. I shrug.

"Demons and mopeds… are pretty cool…" I reply, and leave the room. I hear Raven make a sound of confusion as I exit and then her light form shuffling across the room. She's gone to see what I've thrown away. I don't go back in to stop her. I think she should read it.

Maybe she'll realize I _do_ think about some things seriously.

Maybe she'll decide I might be worth something…

…Or maybe she'll just pity me…

…And buy me a moped.

* * *

Author's Note: o.O ... no comment... I know it's short... the next one will be more serious... and hopefully better... sorry if this killed you...

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran


	19. Part 8: Beast Boy: The Angel Next Door

**Part 8: Beast Boy The Angel Next Door**

_Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans nor the idea for the title of this fic. It is from a song. The plot, however, is original…promise.

* * *

_

There is an angel that lives next door to me. She's lost. She fell from heaven and landed in the room next door, content to pretend she's all black empty. But she's not. I know she's not. No matter what she thinks, no matter who her father is… she's changed her destiny.

I think she might realize that she's still got her wings, one day. That kind of scares me. I guess I'm selfish, but I'm almost glad that she doesn't know she can fly away and reach so much more than this. People say that you have to let go of the things you love the most, and that if they really love you back then they'll return.

But I'll be blunt. It takes too long. I let go of Terra, and she came back too late. She came back and wound up in an eternal tomb of earth. So, I'll keep the angel next door ignorant of her wings and ignorant of the chains that she's already broken through. Hopefully, that'll be enough to keep her tethered to me for the moment.

At least, I want it to be enough. I need this time to show her that she may have fallen from heaven, but there's happiness on earth too.

I know that it's selfish, but I think Raven needs someone to be selfish.

I hear someone knocking on my door. Light taps on steel, tentative and unsure. My green eyes blink curiously, and I swagger over to greet my guest.

It's my angel.

And she has something to say. I see her violet eyes wide and brilliant, her fists clutched up before her chest. Her hair is tucked neatly behind her ears, but there is a stubborn strand of indigo silk that refuses to stay put. Her billowing blue cloak swallows her delicate form.

"Beast Boy… I… can I come in?" she says carefully. I am surprised. My angel is never very sociable. With me least of all. None the less, I nod numbly. I'm not about to deny her. She shuffles in swiftly and the door hisses shut behind us both. "You may want to sit down." She murmurs quietly. I do so, slouching onto the bottom bunk of my bed and eyeing her expectantly.

"I though you might like to hear this before I told the others," she beings softly. I cock my head to the side, intent upon knowing this special revelation.

"What is it, Rae?" I ask. She drops her hands back to her sides. Her pale face is lit with a rare flutter of emotion; a brush of butterfly wings across her face. Her lips are pulled into a very tiny upward curve, but there is a sad line to them which makes her expression hard to read. It's her eyes that betray a touch of doubt.

"I know how to bring Terra back now." She says.

I stare at her, suddenly frozen in time, my eyes wide and lips parted in the quivering beginning of a gasp that won't quite happen. My brain tumbles into overdrive and I'm fighting the melancholy look on Raven's face and the flood of memories stained with images of Terra. Terra…

My first love.

The one I let go…

The one that came back too late.

"Terra?" I breathe, almost unable to comprehend the concept. It's been a year. Nearly a year and a half…

"Yes." She answers me, forcing her features into an overly-practiced blankness. "I thought… perhaps we ought to try to free her… just the two of us. I wanted you to be there, because she's… well… she's _Terra_. And I know how you and Terra were… are…" she mumbles. "I though we should do it without telling the others, in case it doesn't work." She adds.

I nod slowly, still numb. I can't think right now. Not much. "Aren't you excited?" I blurt.

The angel looks away.

"You're still mad at her?" I ask. She shakes her head.

"No. Everyone needs second chances. I'm… happy…" she utters in a hushed tone. I don't quite understand. "Beast Boy, I'm sorry. I'm being selfish is all. Really, I'm excited for you _and_ her. I just can't show emotion, remember?" she finishes, but her voice rises in pitch slightly. Something bothers her. I wonder if she still can't trust Terra. I wonder what it will take for her to free Terra.

"Raven… what's wrong. Tell me." I prod. She shakes her head, pulls up her hood… closes her eyes.

"Like I said, I'm being selfish. Do you want to go now? The others are asleep. We can have her back safely before dawn. You can have Terra back." She rambles quickly. I shake my head slowly.

"Not until you tell me what's wrong. You should be happy, but you're not. I know you're not." I say. She deflates, shoulders drooping, and her form shrinks further within the folds of her cloak.

"I just… I guess I sort of feel like… she takes you away from me. Not that you're mine, or anything… I want her to be able to breathe again and live again, but I'm…" she trails off. "I'm afraid she'll make you think badly of me."

I blink rapidly. Take me away from her? I didn't think the angel even wanted me near her. She's my friend, but she's different. She likes her solitude. I hadn't thought she would mind much if I weren't always there. "Terra wouldn't ever make me think badly about you. Terra's not a bad person… she liked you, really. She made a mistake, but she made up for it too. She's good now," I try and assure her. Raven waves my comments away hurriedly.

"She's not a bad person, I know. She's… better. Better with being a friend than I am. She's better at caring than I am." Raven says quietly. "Even now, I'm being disgusting… being jealous…" she spits with a frown. I stare at her for a while, watching the angel tell herself lies.

I place my hands on her shoulders and she looks up at me, confused. I smile softly and lean forward, kissing her cheek. "You're not disgusting, Raven. You're an angel. You just don't know it yet." I say. She looks at me, startled. I look towards my door and then back to her. "Let's go get Terra…" I say.

She nods slowly and we walk out of my room together. We fly side by side as we head towards the cavern in which Terra stands, her hands stretched out in an eternal posture of power. I land at the cave entrance and shift back into human form. Raven sets down behind me.

I turn to face her and she looks worried again. I brush her cheek with my hand. "I let Terra go, Raven. Having her back will be wonderful. You can't know how much I want to see her smile again… but things change, and people mature. Maybe I'm not the best person to talk about maturity, but I've found that whatever happens… Terra and I can only have friendship when she comes back.

"That is, if she'll even accept us. Terra will always have part of my heart, but my heart's grown since she's been gone." I say. For a brief second, Raven looks skeptical. As if she's not quite sure that this exchange can really be happening.

Because she's the one 'without emotions'…

And I'm the one 'without a brain.'

Then again… can't anything be happening if Terra is coming back? "Remember that, Rae. When we go in there," I say, pointing to the cavern before us. "No matter what happens… if it works… if I really get Terra back… or not… My heart's grown. My heart's grown and in the end, it belongs with you. No matter how much I care about Terra," I say. Raven lowers her eyes.

"I feel like I'm stealing something from her. I… I've never even tried to _show_ you that you were my friend… let alone that you mean more…" she murmurs. I shake my head.

"Maybe, but I think… I always knew… somewhere…" I reply. She nods, thinking. And then I'm pretty sure she comes to the same conclusion. She reaches out to me, and I take her hand.

And we walk into the cavern to free Terra.

Together.

And no matter what happens… the angel next door…

Is the real angel of my heart.

* * *

Author's Note: My appologies for the long wait, but hopefully it was vaguely worth it. This is the official end of Chicken Soup. I don't know how well this idea worked out, but I'd had the notion to do a ficcy like this at some point. It's one of those ones which could probably turn into a longer fic, but I felt it was conclusive enough to be left as a one-shot. I seriously don't know how badly it really came out because I failed to proof-read this one. Oh well. I hope it's bearable. As far as my next endeavor... well, I'm thinking perhaps "To Ashes For You" will be next, eventually followed by "Love me Senseless." However, with the upcoming end to Teen Titans, I want to concentrate my time on "Chasing Mirrors," which is, of course, my _own_ season six... seven... and however long I end up taking it. So, I'm not going to give any definite on what I'll come out with next. Just know that just because TT is ending, I'm not going to stop writing.

As always, thanks for following me through the duration of this fic, your support is amazing. I hope you will continue to check back to see more of my work, and I assure you that I'm still chock-full of one-shots. For those of you who've read through all of this, you've endured my first attempts at bbxrae one-shots and any cyborg-centered fics, as well as my early tries at decent first-person writing. I marvel at all of you for your patience.

Love, Princess Starfire of Tamaran

P.s.- Sorry for the length of this note! .


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